Bonnie Holland

stop the presses

2010-11-01T21:30:00.001-04:00

UPDATE:

Just spoke with very cute 30 year old man and we are going out again this week.

Persistance and anxiety do sometimes pay off.

don't let me be lonely

2010-11-01T20:05:00.004-04:00

My boyfriend and I broke up about a month ago today, for reasons that are a little too personal for the interwebs. It was a very difficult decision that still plagues me today, even though I know I made the right choice. We had been together for almost a year and a half. For all that time, I always had someone with me who loved me. Now I am single. And it is not easy. He was my first real relationship and I got very attached. I got very used to having him around. I got very used to having someone to hug and kiss me when I got home, to tell me they love me. Now when I come home, all I have is my (very cute and very loving) puppy. And she is not a cuddler. I eat dinner alone and usually watch TV or read until bedtime.

For a brief moment about a week ago, I thought things were starting to look way up. I was applying for a job at the Georgia Museum of Art as assistant curator and a very cute man that I've had a pseudocrush on for a LONG time agreed to have dinner with me. I thought my life was going to turn around and I would finally start living like an adult.

The job opening was filled before I could even complete my application. The very cute man and I had a lovely date...and I have not heard from him since.

I guess maybe my expectations were a little too high, not very realistic. I should not have gotten so worked up about the job and should not have expected ONE date to blossom into a beautiful and loving relationship (although, it would have been nice. he is very, very cute). And I probably should not have jumped right back into the dating world so soon. This whole dating thing with all its rules and such is not something I'm very good at. I'm very straight forward and honest and open about my feelings, which means I told this man I liked him and wanted to go out with him and called him the day after our date to tell him that I had a lovely time. Apparently, I broke about seven "rules" doing those two things. Which I did not think would matter to an almost 30 year old adult, but given his absence, apparently it does (and gawd I hope that very cute 30 year old man does not read this because if my chances with him were not already ruined, they would be after him this bleeding heart blog).

So now I'm back to where I was at the beginning of October. Listless, sad and so so worried that my life will be like this forever, alone with a dead-end job. I'm so afraid to put myself out there anymore because of the chance of being hurt again, which I'm not sure I could handle. There will be other jobs, there will be other very cute men, I know. I should be RELISHING this time of my life. I'm 25, I am college educated and very hard working. I'm smart and funny and at least mildly attractive. When my mom was 25, she had two children and was pregnant with her third. My only responsibility to another living thing is to feed my dog, take her out for walks, and scratch her belly everyday (which really isn't that different from having a boyfriend). I should be celebrating my independence! My ability to go out and do just about whatever I want! And I think I will reach that point, eventually. But right now, I'm still pretty low.

I will say, if I have only learned one thing from this experience thus far, it is that I have an excellent support system in my friends and family. No matter what I come to them with, they are there for me; they will (and have) dropped whatever it is they are doing and come to my side. I am truly blessed and lucky to have them in my life. I hope that through this, I can learn to be a better friend to those in need, like my friends have been to me.

My birthday is next week, and regardless of that last paragraph, I am very much afraid that I will spend next Thursday, at home, eating cereal for dinner.

the graduate

2010-07-13T23:03:00.001-04:00

I GRADUATE FROM COLLEGE IN 18 DAYS!!!

omgomgomgomgomgomg

maybe i'm just like my father too bold

2010-07-11T00:30:00.002-04:00

He drank today. For some reason, he thinks that he can hide it from me. But I can always tell, there really is no point in even asking. Aside from the smell permeating from his body, he is much more talkative and his eyes can't seem to focus. I can always tell, its always the same. He came upstairs as I was getting ready to go to sleep; I asked (in a tone more bitchy than necessary) if he planned on continuing to pretend that he had done nothing wrong AND lied to me about it, repeatedly. He said nothing. I prodded, which lead to an argument. I told him that even though I had made several empty promises about kicking him out or breaking up with him if he drank again, one day, I would snap and remove him from my life for good. Like usual, he did not seem too perturbed by that. We argued a little more, resulting in no resolution and him taking a pillow and blanket downstairs and me making snarky comments like "start looking for apartments" and "I'm locking the door, don't bother trying to come back up here". I watched some TV in an attempt to wind down before going to sleep, but couldn't stop thinking about the situation.

Part of me feels like I should feel triumphant; that even though the argument didn't really come to any close, he is being "punished" by sleeping on the couch, while I get my super comfy bed all to myself.

Then the other part of me, the part of me that has been in love with him since pretty much the day we met, recognizes that while yes, I do have this big bed all to myself, I'm still sleeping alone tonight. No one to cuddle with, no one to kiss me goodnight and tell me they love me. Not having the comforting knowledge that even if we aren't touching at all when we're asleep, I have someone beside me who cares for me. And to think if this continues, the fighting, the lying, the not talking about the fighting and the lying, it may be a long time before I find that comfort again. That terrifies me. Maybe I'm just a brat who has gotten so used to having a boyfriend who is madly in love with me, that the thought of losing the little comforts he provides me is scary. Or more likely, I'm 24 and in the first real relationship of my life and I have no idea what the hell I'm doing.

Either way, I will be sleeping on the left side of the bed, on my stomach, not moving around at all because I'm so used to him being on my right. I will be sleeping alone.

on taking criticism well

2010-06-30T16:53:00.002-04:00

OMG how long has it been since I last wrote something!

I am currently taking my very last class as an undergrad and I met with my professor to discuss a bibliography for a project. Before leaving, I told her I was meeting with a career counselor and asked if there were any specific questions I should ask or fields I should inquire on. She told me of a few things, and said something to the affect of "you could go into publishing...well, actually

WRITING ISN'T REALLY YOUR FORTE

so maybe publishing isn't for you..."

I stared at her, mouth agape, not knowing how to respond.

I have seriously considered, upon graduating, keeping my college job as a cashier and focusing on writing a book, instead of pursuing a career in the field of art history. I would absolutely love to become a professional author and devote all my time to my creativity, organizing my thoughts and putting them out there for people to enjoy and possibly learn from or relate to. I've written my whole life, everyone in my family writes, and I just got a subscription to Poets and Writers magazine.

imagine my horror to hear that I'm not a good writer.

I do have to take into consideration that my professor has never read any of my CREATIVE writing and therefore was not commenting on my ability to write as I would like to and the way in which I feel I excel.

HOWEVER

This is now my...fourth class with this specific professor and I have written COUNTLESS papers for her and made high grades on all of those papers; so how can she, purely on an academic basis, say I'm not a good writer? I obviously am a capable writer, but perhaps she feels that writing papers on art history would not be a career I would excel in? I don't know, I don't know why someone would ever phrase a statement like that or say that to someone who is about to go out into the world searching for a job and is probably terrified of that idea, I DON'T KNOW.

What I do know, is that WHEN I publish a book (not on art history), the dedication will read:

To Janice Simon, who once said to me, "Writing really isn't your forte."

And I will personally deliver a signed copy to her.

you say you want a revolution

2010-03-03T22:19:00.002-05:00

Let me begin by saying, I really don't have time to write this. I have a HUGE midterm tomorrow that I have not studied for, but I am so full of angst right now, I need an outlet, and talking with my drunk brother did not sate my desire for outrage.

The Georgia government has demanded that several of the Georgia University System schools cut budgets, DRASTICALLY. After UGA cut their budget drastically recently. They want more.

Of all the things to cut the budget of, EDUCATION IS YOUR CHOICE? Georgia already has such a poor education system and you want to take money away from people who have made the decision to get a HIGHER education? Made the decision to learn more about the world and people around them, which makes them not only more educated, but better people overall? People who sacrifice their time and money to spend four (+) years in order to become better people? It is already super difficult to get by in college, the government wants to make it more difficult?

How does UGA propose to cut costs? By firing professors, cutting programs that would force some students to transfer to other schools and by potentially closing the Botanical Gardens and cutting the budget of the Georgia Museum of Art so drastically that it could barely stay open. Oh, and possibly hiking tuition by over 70% and limiting the incoming freshman class.

No where in the proposal is anything mentioned about athletics. OK, I know, this is such a touchy subject, and I know I have very angry feelings about UGA's emphasis on SPORTS, but think about it for a second. Ok, so the UGA athletic department is primarily funded by revenue generated from those sports (how much did you pay for a Georgia/Florida ticket?) and whatever money is leftover goes back into the university system (however, I can't really tell after looking over their budget where exactly this money is being funneled into, all I could get is that UGA has an airplane), so I can't really say, "oh, let's cut out the athletic programs to save money", because they're pretty much self sufficient.

HOWEVER

Think about those athletes. They are students. They have their education paid for and are pampered for four years (unless of course they get drafted early. Please see my previous blog about Matthew Stafford not needing a dictionary). Some of those athletes were admitted to UGA with a three digit SAT score and a 2.1 GPA. Why? Because they can throw a football/dribble a basketball/hit a volleyball/etc.

Where is our emphasis? If the freshman class is cut, who are we cutting? The kid who desperately wants to make a change for herself, learn more of the world, become a doctor/lawyer/teacher/etc? OR the boy who can throw a football and will look good in tight silver pants and probably won't even graduate? What about the people who choose to stay an extra fall semester just to have another football season? Those hungover jerks are taking up room (physical ROOM) that could be filled by bright young minds who are actually eager, yearning to LEARN.

THIS MAKES ME SO ANGRY. What does my education mean now? Am I lucky that I got in when I did, with the HOPE scholarship and my program still intact? I already don't have access to the Georgia Museum of Art (because it is being renovated, which I'm sure cost millions of dollars which seems ironic now), meaning I don't have access to works of art and many many books that would further my education. What happens if that is taken away completely?

What is it going to take to make people stand up for education? People are ok with cutting art and music programs, and have been for a long time, will it just be when we stop teaching history and math that people will get angry enough to make a difference? What does this mean for my brothers and sister? What will their college experience be like, assuming that they will be able to have one? If I have children, what will be available to them? Will Mommy have to tell them stories of the days when I sat around all day, learning of Venetian art and dinosaurs? My opportunity to LEARN is a luxury, it is time that I stood up and defended that luxury.

Whew. I feel a little better. I may not even study for this art history midterm. If the government of Georgia doesn't want to support my education in art, why should I even bother?

Giving Thanks

2009-12-26T21:51:00.002-05:00

As I celebrated Christmas with my family, I began to think about all of the traditions associated with Christmas. My mother asked me to sing a song for my family, which I did, and had a multitude of songs to choose from. Mom's house was covered in beautiful decorations, the tree, the lights, the wreath. We had a lovely dinner (and dessert!) and opened a few presents and then to bed until Christmas morn.

Christmas day played out much like Christmas Eve. More presents, huge breakfast, followed by general laziness by all. This was repeated at my father's house later in the evening.

The Christmas season got me to thinking about other holidays. Easter, Halloween, birthdays, Fourth of July. They are all surrounded by so many traditions and rituals. We sing, we eat, we get together with people we love. And then I thought, what about Thanksgiving?

What about Thanksgiving? It is the day we celebrate the bully behavior of the first American settlers for kicking off the natives so we could live here. We do get together with our families and we do eat, but what the hell else is there?

Take Halloween for example. Halloween is ALWAYS on October 31. Thanksgiving doesn't even have a set day, just an understood rule that its on some Thursday in November. Some people spend the entire year developing a costume to wear on Halloween; do we really get that dressed up for Thanksgiving?

And what about the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade? IT IS A PARADE DEVOTED TO ANOTHER HOLIDAY. Don't try and tell me that that parade is about Thanksgiving, it is clearly all about Christmas.

At least Easter gets a mascot. Does Thanksgiving have a mascot? The turkey? We EAT turkey on Thanksgiving. Do we eat rabbit on Easter? Or pumpkins on Halloween? NO.

What Thanksgiving songs are there? There is a song exclusively devoted to birthdays, what about that Thursday in November?

I understand that Thanksgiving is a good holiday, and one that should be celebrated, I just think it kind of got the short end of the holiday stick. All it really has are large ugly birds and Publix commercials. Time to step it up, Thanksgiving. Take back the parade!!! Sing some songs! Get a mascot that we don't devour! I would be thankful for that.

seamus hackworth?

2009-12-20T19:13:00.002-05:00

James,

I couldn't send you a message on facebook, so assuming that you (for some reason) still read my blog, would you please message me on facebook or something? I want to talk to you. Or more like apologize.

Girl who was a huge bitch last time we spoke,

Bonnie

Oh and hey everyone else. I will update more soon, I have so many ideas. After Christmas, I don't work again until January 2, so expect something great!

Faux Poor

2009-10-23T16:24:00.001-04:00

As Leah pointed out what should have been obvious to me, I am posting the piece I wrote for Kyle on here. Enjoy and watch for more!

Fashion: Faux Poor

If you're a student at UGA or a resident of Athens, you're familiar with the designer products a majority of students are privileged enough to wear. You could be thinking of anything; if it can be made "designer," someone in Brumby will have it. Whether it be the now mass-produced fleece jacket to match your mass-produced bookbag, those shorts with the lines that are supposed to streamline your legs (they don't), to computers to keychains, to the luxury vehicle that even your dad can't afford, brand names unfortunately abound in the Classic City. It can be really difficult for a student not so privileged to feel adequate enough when their sunglasses don't have two tiny white words printed on the lens. So what does a young person do when they can't afford to fit in, say... in Terry? I have one name for you:

Lamar Dodd.

Welcome to the Mecca of the faux poor, the destitute destination for all of the University. How often have you seen someone downtown and thought to yourself, "I wonder if that person is homeless?" and it turns out they're just a pottery major? I know I have, and I've developed a keen eye for the style of the art student. Rich or poor, hobo chic is the way to dress down at the art school. And the look of the art student is oh so easy to emulate. Allow me to suggest some ways that you, yes YOU, can become your own Chuck Close, a modern day Van Gogh (ear chopping not required, though the dried blood would look pretty beggarly):

#1 - Hygiene.

DO. NOT. BATHE. Seriously. This is the foundation of looking (and smelling) like an art student. And if you absolutely have to shower, do not wash your hair. Speaking of hair, you should probably cut it into something choppy, and bangs are a must. Both of those techniques provide a good base for the greasy look you are trying to achieve. The dirtier you are, the poorer you look. The poorer you look, the less understood you feel; and the less understood you are, the better your art is.

#2 - Clothing.

Know those terrible jeans your mom made you wear in like middle school? Dig them out and wear them everyday for the remainder of the semester. Pretty much anything without a collar and with an ironic logo is acceptable for the top, but rips, tears and stains definitely say, "I sleep in a box." Also, any art supply you can get on the clothing is excellent, even if you don't paint, draw, etc. Rub a charcoaled hand across your shirt and go!

#3 - Accessories.

Scarves. And nothing else. Lots and lots of scarves. Don't have one? Ask Dr. Zuraw if you can borrow one of hers.

Oh, and get a couple of tattoos.

#4 - Cigarettes.

Ok, this may not exactly fall into the "poor" aspect, as cigarettes cost money, but you have to smoke. Preferably American Spirits or Parliaments. It may as well be a requirement to become an art major, like a superinflated ego.

These are just a few suggestions, and if you're actually poor, you'll have no problem fitting in and making friends.

Until the smelly kid next to you pulls out his MacBook and starts taking notes. Because remember, these art kids are not actually poor: Their torn up, "vintage" style probably costs as much, if not more than those logo-ed co-ed clothes. And believe me, American Spirits are NOT cheap. The trick, however, is to appear poverty-stricken and if you actually are broke, the art kids will never know the difference. So all you poor kids who feel that you can’t fit in anywhere on North Campus, make the trek down to Lamar Dodd, light up one of your expensive cigarettes and feel welcome.

Can’t draw?

Don’t worry, neither can they.

the goat

2009-10-22T18:30:00.003-04:00

Hello everyone!

School this semester is INTENSE and I apologize for my lack of writing.

However, a friend of mine has started a satirical blog for UGA and has recruited me to write for him! Stop by and read my first article and let me know what you think!

thegoat-uga.blogspot.com

to bang or not to bang?

2009-09-16T16:43:00.004-04:00

TWO POSTS IN ONE DAY?!

I'm getting a haircut on Sunday* and I cannot decide what I want to do!!! I've had an on/off relationship with bangs for about two years now and I think I want them back, but I cannot decide. I need your help. Sooo....

No bangs? Or.....

Bangs?

*City Salon is hosting a cut-a-thon on Sunday from 12-5pm. All haircuts are 20$ and all proceeds go to Project Safe. No appointments, just a first come, first served basis. GREAT DEAL.

its been a while

2009-09-16T11:31:00.002-04:00

Hello all five people that read my blog.

I apologize for the absence and my own laziness. As previously stated, having a boyfriend is a lot of work (which I plan to write an entire, lengthy blog about) and now that school has started back, I'm taking four classes and working 18 hours a week, I have very little time. BUT, in an effort to put my life in some sort of order, I want to get my blog going again. I love having it as a creative outlet, and as just a place to share all the things I find interesting about my young life. And Leah, don't worry, I have a long list of things that need to be blogged about, so it will be sometime before you're bored.

However, today's blog will be short. I should be working on a paper right now that is due on Friday. I'm just proud of myself that its not Thursday night at 9pm when I start it. Anyway, I want to share with all of you a website that I find amusing. Amusing is not even an adequate word to describe this website, honestly.

We all think there is something strange or weird about our family. It could be the uncle you have that wears short shorts, or perhaps your grandma has more cats than grandchildren. Either way, chances are good that you have taken a photograph (or five) with said weird relative. Enter the greatest collection of photographs to behold...

awkwardfamilyphotos.com

I will say, as the website has gained popularity, the photos have waned in quality. And by that I mean there are fewer pictures of adults in Whinnie The Pooh costumes, so you may have to go back and look through several pages to find the truly awkward ones.

But trust me, it is totally worth it.

Maybe I'll upload that one of Dad in a union suit from Christmas morning 1987...

I spilled a bottle of water...

2009-07-06T17:10:00.002-04:00

A while ago, I posted about a website called "fmylife.com" and about how funny it is.

Here, my friends, is its less funny, but still amusing, almost dry, little sister, mylifeisaverage.com.

Happy Monday, everyone.

The Picture of Dorian Gray Hair Cover-up

2009-07-03T09:41:00.003-04:00

Hello all. I know it has been too long since I last posted. By way of excuse, I am taking two summer classes, working and have recently started dating someone. Like actually dating them. Like I have a boyfriend. But I digress.

Last month, I was reading the June issue of Vogue, and was enjoying the issue as I usually do. Then I came across the article "Fat Chances", an article that has the sub-headline of "will body perfection one day be possible...a new world way beyond lipo". The article goes on to detail how women these days along with wanting to look thin, also want to look young: "Ten years ago, the women who came to see me just wanted to look thinner...now they want their body to look younger, too". (May I add here that this is coming from the magazine that at some point last year had what they called the Body Issue, which celebrated many different types of bodies. yeah. seriously.) The article has sections titled "The Fat Blasters: Lipo Plus", "Fat-Dissolving Injections", "The Tighteners" (which in my opinion sounds like the title of a horror film), and "Cellulite: The Eternal Scourge".

I think at this point, I put the magazine down and thought about never opening another issue of Vogue again.

As a young woman, with virtually no gray hair or wrinkles or other "age" markers, I haven't really thought about what it will be like to look older. I have thought about what it will be like for my hair to go gray, and have pretty well decided that I will never dye my hair and just let it age naturally. I read a quote by Ann Curry a few years ago that I tried to find, but could not, so I will paraphrase, but it was something like "I hope that one day my wrinkles will show how much I laughed and lived". It was something much more poetic than that. My point is that I am going to live a full life and laugh a lot and probably cry a lot and yeah, my face is going to show that. Yes, I use moisturizer and eye cream and wear huge sunglasses until dusk, but I'm not that worried about getting wrinkles.

Now, apparently, I need to start worrying about what age my BODY looks.

If you've read any of my previous writing, you know that I get a little worked up over body image issues. However, I've only focused on the problems that YOUNG women face, children, teenagers and women my age. I guess I sort of assumed that women matured out of the whole "caring about what the world thinks of you" thing. I assumed wrong. It is not enough anymore to think that you aren't thin or pretty enough, now you need to think that you're not young enough. That maybe your stomach isn't that flat anymore or your hips are a little bit wider (the author of the article mentions the "curve of her lower back". I had no idea that was a problem area. oops).

What in the hell is so wrong with looking your age?

When we are younger, we want to look older. When we are older, we want to look younger. I get that. But going to extreme measures, using something called "the tighteners" to look 25 again?

In the same issue of Vogue, there is an interview with Cameron Diaz, in which she says, "I'm not 25 years old anymore, nor do I want to be. I wouldn't even want to go back to being 30. That journey-I've done it already". HOW CAN YOU HAVE THAT IN THE SAME ISSUE AS SOMETHING ABOUT HATING YOUR AGING BODY?! Nice work, editing.

There is a lot that is screwed up about the way Americans treat women, the way this culture expects women to look like, so my next statement is most likely unnecessary, but what happened to age=wisdom? What happened to the respect that comes with living, with experience, with knowing more about the world through LIFE? Or is that still there, we just expect our women to live always in the shadow of impending liposuction? We can only respect an elderly woman if she appears to be 30?

I really hate that this new way of self-loathing has been brought to my attention. Now I know that for ever long I live, there will always be a new way to hate my body.

I better go wrap myself in sea kelp now and age away in an infrared sauna.

HOTlanta

2009-06-07T20:10:00.002-04:00

I have often wondered why Southerners tend to be more creative than people from other parts of the country. I honestly believe it is because they are so hot for so much of their life. Maybe the heat makes your brain more imaginative, or maybe it just melts down your inhibitions, allowing creativity to flow as freely as the sweet tea. Or maybe this whole time I've been mistaking insanity for imagination.

It is interesting to me how it appears that we in the south don't deal well with weather. If it rains, we freak out. If it snows, just stay in your home, leaving will only result in confusion. It seems we are only content when it is 73 degrees and sunny.

But the heat, the heat is a completely different animal. From April until October, the south puts on us a great big snuggie and doesn't take it off until Thanksgiving. You can't sit still without sweating. People say that life in the south is so slow, we do everything so slow. Let them live in Georgia in July and see how fast they do things. This heat makes me want to lie completely still on a giant block of ice. This heat makes me want to chop off all my hair and throw away anything with sleeves. And it's not even the hottest it will get yet. It is only the beginning of June. Soon, the only refuge we will get is the hours after the earth has finally cooled from the hot afternoon, right before the sun comes up. Those few hours are the coolest, when most of us should be asleep, before the south has a chance to heat up again.

When people say "the south will rise again", maybe they just mean the temperature.

batons and self loathing

2009-06-03T22:18:00.001-04:00

I guess it's never too early to start hating your body.

get in shape, girl

Camp Lesbian

2009-05-29T22:02:00.002-04:00

On Monday, Chelsea and I drove 5.5 hours to visit the glamorous Myrtle Beach, South Carolina, for a few reasons:

#1 We both wanted to go to the beach.

#2 It is relatively close.

#3 My aunt Jill and her partner, Mischelle live there.

#4 Please see reason #1.

The drive was very easy and we arrived Monday afternoon to my aunt's house, greeted by Jill and her fifteen dogs. I mean, four dogs, including one pug puppy with a name that I cannot remember that sounds like a Middle Eastern country. We ate a quick lunch and asked where the nearest beach would be with the least amount of people. Jill directed us to Lichfield or something like that, which appeared to be a sort of haven for rich white people who lack creativity in their need to name their beach houses. We walked out on the sand, breathed in the sea air and found a spot to lay in the overcast sun. I immediately went in the water, feeling the waves crash around me. It felt so good. I went to lay in the sun, shamed into keeping on my shorts by the buff old ladies running on the beach and ogled the one young man on the beach instead. After a few hours, we went back to Jill's to change and go eat dinner, being led to the most expensive Chinese buffet ever by my "adopted" "cousin" (apparently my aunt's penchant for taking in stray dogs is only rivaled by her need to rescue teens in distress). Chelsea and I drank $12 worth of water, found some kick ass koozies and went back to the house, exhausted. The rest of the evening is mostly a blur, something about Miller High Life, a woman named Annette who wants to be like me when she grows up, and Trivial Pursuit. Bed.

We got up at some point and went to the beach before it could rain. We agreed to apply sunscreen once an hour, on the hour. We thought we succeeded, but soon found that we did not, and that we were both burned. That aside, it was one of the most enjoyable days at the beach I have ever experienced. The sun was shining, it was not too hot, the ocean was blue and lovely. Those damn old ladies and their hot legs did make an appearance, but other than that, it was a great day at the beach. Until we left and realized how burned we were. We went back to the house and showered and went in search of food. We wanted a local pizza place, so Mischelle directed us to Mama Bella's, which we were told was next to The Hot Dog Queen. She was not joking, there is a place called The Hot Dog Queen. We went to Mama Bella's and met the nicest woman ever, who gave us free drinks as she hand made our pizza. Quella pizza era migliore pizza. It was so good. We all watched Hotel for Dogs and soon went to bed.

We got up early on Wednesday, as we were leaving that afternoon and wanted to have a full day. We did, however, wish to remain fully clothed to avoid any further sun damage. Mischelle suggested we go to a pier in Garden City. Piers always make me think of the 1940s for some reason, despite the number of people in ill fitting swim suits. We took pictures of a pelican and then stared at the ocean for close to an hour (and when I say "ocean", I mean people in the water and when I say "people" I mean boys and when I say "boys" I mean males who look much older from far away but once you get close to them you realize they are probably still in highschool). We bought more kick ass koozies and I finally got a hot dog. We made our way back to the house, packed, kissed all the dogs good-bye, posed for party boat pictures and started home.

I'm pretty sure if there is something you can think of that could go wrong while you're on a long drive, that thing happened to us on the way home. First, we were caught in a scene from Twister which resulted in us pulled off on the side of the road cramming kit-kats down our throats to distract from the monsoon. THEN, we were happened upon Columbia, South Carolina at 5pm which is apparently South Carolina time for "let's all get into pretty bad wrecks". We saw at least three wrecks + what had to have been rush hour traffic. It took us half an hour to go like two miles. THEN, we started hearing this weird flapping sound. We pulled off the road and saw that a piece of Chelsea's car had come unhinged. We deemed the piece unimportant and kept driving. It took us over SIX HOURS to get back to Athens, and when we did, it was a relief.

Overall, it was a great time. It was very chill, very relaxing, which is exactly what we both wanted. I had a pretty brutal spring semester and am taking two summer classes that start next week, so this was a very welcome break from school, work and Athens. But I am glad to be home, glad my sunburn is healing, glad that I have the knowledge that Camp Lesbian is only 5.5-6 hours away.

fml

2009-05-23T15:09:00.004-04:00

Summer is here and I have been surprised to find how much time it takes to do absoultely close to nothing. One of my many distractions, besides craigslist and library books, is this absolutely hliarious website. I mean, it probably isn't as funny as if I had just composed some brilliant blog about how I had dinner with/taught English (and maybe a little French too hehe) to a Czech guy last night, but close.

fml

all of my beeswax

2009-05-18T19:48:00.003-04:00

I am not very trendy. I am usually one of the last people to know or try something.

I'll give you a moment to silently disagree with that.

I STILL don't have a digital camera and I think was the last person on earth to play guitar hero.

HOWEVER

If there is one thing I'm hip to, it is lip product.

When I was in the second grade, my family moved to Conyers, Georgia where my dad worked as the operations manager at Underground Atlanta. At the mall, there was a store The Nature Store or something like that. There, they sold a little known product called Burt's Bees.

Even at a young age, I was a lip balm connoisseur. I had tried them all, Chaptstick, Lip Smackers, SoftLips. They all paled in comparison to this minty balm that came in the yellow tin. My father brought some home one day to me and I have never looked back. I very rarely strayed, always having a little tin of minty delight in my pocket.

Then, we moved back to Danielsville. And I lost my beloved Nature Store or whatever it was called, along with my lip balm.

BUT ALAS, my mother, being the herbalist that she is, discovered my sweet nectar at Phoenix, a store that used to be downtown on Pulaski but has since moved to Epps Bridge. There, they sold my beloved balm. My friends began trying it, complaining that it would sting their lips, but eventually loving the way it made their lips feel. I soon had half of Danielsville using my beloved product.

You all know how the rest of this story goes. Burt's Bees is now a booming business, selling not just the lip balm, but glosses, lipsticks, and all kinds of bath products. They also have a variety of lip balms, the original, honey and pomegranate, all of which I enjoy (warning: DO NOT try the LifeGuard kind OR the clove. grossgrossgross). Now, when I see Burt's Bees selling at Target and WalMart, I sigh, and think about how I singlehandedly made that company flourish.

Ok, not really. But I have purchased goodness knows how many dollars worth of Burt's products, and will continue to do so. Thanks, Burt! And thanks, bees!

number one draft picks and me

2009-05-07T22:12:00.002-04:00

Hey all. My finals are over! Hoorah! I had plans to go out with my friends and partypartyparty tonight, but my throat started hurting the night before last and has not stopped AND I have to be at work at 8am tomorrow, so I didn't want to risk getting sicker by going out and grinding on strangers. I'll do that Saturday.

Today, I would like to tell the charming stories of my interactions with the NFL's number one draft pick this season (or whatever they call this time frame), the one, the only, Matthew Stafford. My affair with Matthew Stafford began many years ago, on a cold, January day. Young Stafford was in my orientation group at the University of Georgia. We were both young, nervous. Actually, that is not true. I was 20 years old and there with my dad, he was like 17 and there making money breathing. Our eyes met. That probably isn't true either. The only reason I even remember that he was in my orientation group, along with several other football players, is that a rep from the athletic department kept checking on them. Every few minutes, "Do you need anything? Are you ok?" I remember commenting to my dad about how annoying it was. If only I had known what would become of Matthew and me.

I will begin with my third most close interaction with the young athlete. I was standing in Park Hall, waiting to enter my classroom. I saw the quarterback sitting on a bench across from me, reading a paper. Probably looking for mentionings of his own name. Jerk. Anyway, as I was staring at him, a class let out nearby, and students started filing into the hallway. Soon, two bros walked past, talking.

One says, "Hey Matt!"

nothingnothingnothingnothing

The man didn't even look up from his newspaper to acknowledge this young, admiring fan.

I almost laughed aloud and said to the one guy, "Dude, you are TOTALLY not friends with Matthew Stafford!!"

But that would have been rude.

My most intimate encounter with the star (now making over like $70million) was when he came into MY bookstore to sell back some books. Normally, when I see athletes come in, I get annoyed before they even open their mouths or bookbags. While there have been some exceptions (Mohamed Massaqua is one of the nicest men I've ever met. Same with Craig Lumpkin), they usually complain about not getting money back for books they did not buy (or read) in the first place.

But not Matthew.

No, Matthew Stafford put his books in a neat pile on the counter and patiently waited as I told him how much they were worth. One of the books was a hard back, desk-type dictionary. In shrink wrap. He tried to sell it back, and it was not worth anything. I gave him his money and he started to leave, without the dictionary.

I said, "Do you want this?"

His response?

"No, I won't use it."

No, Matthew, you wouldn't, and it looks like you never will.

I should have made him sign it.

brb

2009-05-03T09:38:00.001-04:00

After finals are done!

xoxo

what happened to childhood

2009-04-29T07:54:00.001-04:00

When I was ten, I was probably playing in a pile of dirt or in a creek.

what is the world coming to

mad world

2009-04-26T22:44:00.002-04:00

I hope not to sensationalize this more than it already has been, but these three people were friends of my father. As he put it, "I've lost people before, but never three at one time." I do this to in some way contribute, to recognize what has been done and what has been lost. May their friends and families be comforted.

talk like an egyptian

2009-04-22T22:27:00.002-04:00

"It was impossible to converse with her without being immediately captivated by her. Her voice was velvety, her conversation stimulating, her powers of persuasion matchless; her presence, an event."

I know, I know, you all are thinking that the above quote is about me.

Sorry to disappoint, but it is not. It is about one of the most mysterious women of all time: Cleopatra.

I have long had an interest (obsession) with all things Egyptian, ever since I was a little girl and my mother got us a set of hieroglyphic stamps. I even dressed as Cleopatra for a school event long ago:

Yep, I was really damn cute. Please notice the strategically placed cat.

I stumbled across this article in the New York Times about the tomb of Cleopatra, or what they think is the tomb of Cleopatra. READ IT.

Remember, clever women are dangerous women.

omg school omg

2009-04-20T22:44:00.001-04:00

Please see title.

party with some rockstars

2009-04-17T20:59:00.002-04:00

I was recently introduced to the wonders of Craigslist. Chelsea showed me the "missed connections" section, which was hilarious, and we hoped that we would one day be listed on there (cute brunette, Baxter Street Bookstore).

I soon ventured further from "missed connections" to view the other sections about people. Let me say here that there is a lot of junk on craigslist, a lot of whack people and some vulgar stuff and some RAUNCHY pictures. That being said, I soon found my way over to "men seeking women". 'Cause, you never know.

I came upon a post that said something about "2 weird guys playing show". I was intrigued. I read it, and laughed the whole time. It was two members of a band that would be in Athens on Wednesday night. They were looking for two friends to go on a double date with. They reminded me a lot of a good number of my friends, at least their sense of humor did. And they were cute. I responded to their post, saying that I wasn't sure about the date business, but they seemed like a lot of fun, so I would try and go to their show.

They didn't respond until Wednesday afternoon, and told me I needed to go to the show, and bring my friends. I responded to them with my phone number and told them they could stay at my house if they needed to. I also tried to get Chelsea to go with me to see them, and she said it was a bad idea. Which is honestly probably the more responsible attitude, but my thinking was, this will either be the best night of my life OR I will end up in a ditch somewhere, wearing someone else's underwear. I'm not sure the two are mutually exclusive. But she refused.

I had my doubts, but I finished the paper that was due on Thursday and thought, what the hell, I'm young, I'm single, I've had a long week, I'M GOING FOR IT.

I got to Go Bar and I was the only one there.

Except the band.

All SEVEN of them.

Including Danny and Marcello, the boys I had been texting. We sat around talking for a while, I desperately tried to get more people to the show (thanks, Nicholas for showing up!) and they played a little while later.

AND THEY WERE SO CUTE.

After the show and after they had packed up, I took them to the Grill for coffee and we sat outside the bar, waiting for Chelsea to show up for the double date to begin. Once she got there, we took the rest of the band to my apartment to go to bed, and we four went to Waffle House. They are from San Francisco, so Waffle House was new to them. Then we took them on a ghost tour of campus. We went back to my apartment and played Apples to Apples before passing out around 4am.

Thursday morning, I got up around 11:30, showered and went downstairs. One person was reading, one was playing the acoustic guitar and one was doing yoga. Did I mention that these are like the coolest, chillest people I've ever met? And nicest? So nice. Their music is really dark and heavy and strange, but they are like..there are no words to describe how REAL they are. Half of them are teachers. And all but one are vegetarians.

Naturally, we went to the Grit for lunch (and they would not shut up about Fred Schneider and Michael Stipe). We enjoyed lunch together and then they were on the road to Atlanta.

The moral of this story, kids, is that you can find some great friends via Craigslist. I do caution: if you choose this path, PROCEED WITH CAUTION. I had a good feeling about these guys, and I ended up being right and meeting 7 awesome new people. However, not everyone on craigslist, on the internet is so friendly. Let me also say this: DON'T BE AFRAID TO MAKE A MOVE. I have spent most of my life not taking chances, doing everything right. This was a bold move and I'm so glad I made it. They were so fun.

New Thrill Parade. Look them up.

this isn't goodbye

2009-04-12T23:08:00.002-04:00

I have three papers due this week and a test.

I'll be back on Friday.

Kisses.

wtf spring fashions

2009-04-08T19:33:00.002-04:00

I am not in a good mood.

The first thing I would like to complain about is this military-inspired jacket that I keep seeing. I first saw it on the Sartorialist in March:

I then saw it in Vogue, or Harper's Bazaar. THEN I SAW IT AGAIN:

OMG I HATE IT SO MUCH. And why do you have to wear it with black leather pants? Hmmm???

Secondly, I haaaattteee the way J.Crew rolls up their pant legs. HATE IT. I hate the way it looks.

So imagine my anger when I open The Sartorialist today and see THIS:

WHY OH WHY

*Disclaimer: none of these photos belong to me. Please don't sue me, Mr. Sartorialist or Mr. Crew.

dye-ing for spring

2009-04-07T17:06:00.006-04:00

Those are the pictures I tried to include when I first wrote this. Please excuse my lazy placement.

I just wrote for three hours straight. Ok, maybe not three hours, but from 2-4:30, I was scrivo scrivo scrivo. We started Rembrandt in northern and we had a test in ancient, so my little kid hands are sleepy.

Sunday night, me and a few friends gathered at Chelsea's for a pre-Easter dinner. May I interject here that I had THREE dinner invitations for Sunday night. THREE. I don't get three invitations anywhere in a week. Three in one night. My powers of tricking people into liking me are working...

It was what appeared to be an egg themed evening. Chelsea made quiche (my recipe, which became mine when David gave it to me) and we then dyed eggs for Easter. BUT FIRST we had like the best salad I have ever eaten. Or at least the most aesthetically pleasing salad.

Chelsea made the leafy parts and Ajyra brought the strawberries, walnuts and feta.

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm so good

We then ate the quiche, which is always tasty. Then we dyed eggs! Which I don't know that I have ever done, but it was a lot of fun. Behold the glowing eggs of Easter!

That is some bowl Chelsea had, which appropriately served as a nest for our pastel eggs.

After we dyed the eggs, we ate the pie I made for dessert. It was like the oreo dirt cups you probably made as a child, with chocolate pudding and gummy worms and oreos. At some point, my family started making a pie variation, which I'm sure is common, but I couldn't find the recipe anywhere online. I made it based on the vague directions my mother gave me of "it really isn't that hard to figure out-milk, pudding, cool whip and cream cheese". I poured all of that goodness into an oreo pie crust and topped it with cookie crumbles and gummy worms.

It was so damn good. Good enough that Ajyra broke her no chocolate for Lent vow ("Don't tell anyone. Palm Sunday is close enough, right? Ugh, Bonnie, I wish you had made it in styrofoam cups instead").

It was a fun night, almost warm, but not cold.

Right before the April snow flurries.

reCYCLED not reUSED

2009-04-04T14:52:00.002-04:00

omg I have fifteen things I should be doing AT THIS VERY MOMENT so this will be brief.

From what I have heard, most toilet paper is made from virgin trees (that doesn't mean trees that haven't been germinated. pervert.) Trees that could otherwise be growing, providing shade for a forest and habitat for critters, are being used to make toilet paper. Think about that for a second.

think think think think

Something you use for a very short amount of time and is then discarded (I'm assuming) is made from trees. A renewable resource, yes, but the time it takes TO RENEW them is considerably longer than the time it takes to cut them down.

Now, there are better options for people, like myself, who care about cutting down trees to make toilet paper.

RECYCLED TOILET PAPER!

I was very hesitant at first. My immediate thought was "omg gross they're using toilet paper people have already used to make new toilet paper??" which I knew of course was not the case, but a funny thought none the less. It is made from recycled paper goods, just like any recycled paper you might buy. I bought some probably over a year ago and did not buy it again, as it was not a very good product.

Now that everyone is on the "green" band wagon (either because they have realized we're killing the planet very quickly or it is an excellent way to make money), companies have started to I guess put more time and energy into developing recycled toilet paper that is usable.

Scott has an excellent version that is almost exactly like their regular product. It is a little less soft, but not so much that I would stop using it. It is made from at least 45% recycled materials.

Publix also has a version from their GreenWise line. It too is a very good product. It is made from 100% recycled materials and also uses a chlorine free whitening process.

From my understanding, Marcal makes all of their toilet paper from at least a certain percentage of recycled materials. Several companies will put on the packaging if they make their product from recycled materials or not, and usually give a percentage number.

This is a very small way that you can help the environment. It isn't drastic, it won't cost you money (in fact, I believe most of these products are cheaper than many other brands of toilet paper) and it won't change your quality of life. It will just help to make the world a better, healthier place.

my name is not susan

2009-04-02T18:55:00.003-04:00

If I had to pick for myself a feminist concentration, it would probably be body image issues. Mostly probably because that is something that I personally have dealt with/am dealing with/will probably continue dealing with for the rest of my life.

Body image issues are only a small fraction of the complex and difficult problems women face today. Something that I fortunately have never been faced with is violence. I don't really understand the violence against women thing. My guess is that women are seen as the "weaker sex" and can therefore be taken advantage of? Or maybe it is a form of control.

And it isn't just physical violence that women face. There is emotional abuse, sexual abuse and what I'd like to discuss here, verbal abuse (and many many more).

I watched a video on feministing.com, an anti-violence commercial, that I would like you all to watch. It is only a minute long, so here, watch it.

I understand that a lot of girls my in my age bracket like to use words like "slut" and "whore" and "bitch" as terms of sort of...endearment. I know I do. And I don't mean them as "hey, you, you who sleeps around a whole lot, you want to study with me later?" Those words have just become phrases that we throw around.

Maybe we should think more about what we are saying.

I hope that none of you are actually actively dealing with verbal abuse. The closest I have come to this name calling is drunk idiots calling me "baby" or "sweetheart". But seriously, lets please think a little more about how we speak to one another.

I'll use this as an opportunity to invite everyone to participate with Take Back the Night. It is a way to make people more aware of violence against women and in general. Next Thursday, April 9, there will be events all day at the Tate center, starting around 10am. At around 7:30pm, we will march from the Tate center to city hall, where there will be a candle light vigil. It really is a neat experience, very moving and empowering.

If you're uncomfortable with marching through the streets of Athens, there will also be Dance Back the Night, Tuesday, April 7. It will be at Cine and it starts at 7pm and ends at 2am. Various bands will be playing from 7-midnight and then a DJ will come on. They are asking for a donation of at least $3, and all proceeds benefit The Cottage (formerly the Sexual Assault Center of Northeast Georgia). It should be a lot of fun, and I know I'm really excited for it.

I know a lot of what I post is comical or silly or me ranting about cereal, but this is something I take very seriously, something that is very dear to me. Even if you just read this and maybe change the way you speak to women (and I too am going to reevaluate my speech) or maybe talk to a friend about this, it would mean so much to me.

AND IT WOULD SO MUCH MORE IF YOU CAME AND DANCED AND/OR MARCHED!!!

gonna make you (not) sweat til you bleed

2009-03-31T21:51:00.003-04:00

I sweat. A lot. I think it runs in my family and it is totally gross and uncomfortable.

I think it also has something to do with living in the south, where in the summer, you sweat standing still. Well, summer, fall and spring. And parts of December.

Anyway, I have tried several various deodorants to limit my sweat output. Out of high school, a friend recommended I try Certain Dri.

This stuff actually works really well. The only thing about it is that you have to put it on at night, before you go to bed. And you can't put it on after showering or shaving. So you can't shower before bed. BUT it does all but stop underarm sweat (which I began to wonder if that was unhealthy or not) and after I stopped using it, for a long time, I still sweated less.

But of course, like stupid acne, the sweating came back. I guess the excessive sweating phenomenon is sweeping the country, because starting some time last year, several major deodorant brands came out with their own "prescription strength" products. I myself have only tried the Dove version. Behold:

What I like about this deodorant is that it smells great, like regular deodorant. However, this one is a little bit tricksy.

The directions say to apply the deodorant at night, before bed, like the Certain Dri.

AH HA!

I have some friends who also tried this, and they discovered that if you put it on in the morning, like regular deodorant (or whenever you put on your deodorant), it works so much better than applying it at night. I recently ran out of this and have been using regular anti-perspirant/deodorant and I have not been sweating excessively.

There you have it, friends. My secret to smelling great and being confident when raising my hand. At least until this stops working and I start pouring sweat again. In like, May.

a dream, a freaky freaky dream

2009-03-28T16:41:00.005-04:00

I had a dream last night that was very strange and upsetting.

I often have very odd dreams involving the people around me, some that manifest in real life in similar yet altered ways. I'm hoping that if anything happens with this one, it is nothing like the dream.

I dreamt that I was in bed, when a man came in my room (a stranger to me, but in my dream, I knew him well), sat next to my bed, and told me that my neighbor, Matt, had died. I started crying, I was very upset, and what happened after that is hazy. However, the next few parts, are very clear.

-REMEMBER, THIS IS ALL STILL PART OF MY DREAM-

Parker, my brother, told me that Andrew, Matt's roommate, had also died. He was with his girlfriend (which is weird, because she is in Athens this weekend) in her car and they were in an accident. I was upset, crying, thinking if I could keep the puppy he just adopted.

THEN

I walked outside, and there they both were, Matt and Andrew, standing on the porch. I was elated, until I realized that they were ghosts. They looked completely normal, just like they do in real life. I kept asking what was going on, and they assured me that they were dead, but would be sticking around for a while. I kept thinking "boy, that apartment is going to get crowded when new people move in". Then Andrew asked me to go somewhere with him.

He got in A car (his car in the dream, not his car in real life) and we started driving. I asked where we were going. His first response was "Atlanta", which was a little daunting, a dead guy driving through Atlanta? But we ended up just going to a grocery store, a Harris Teeter, which is funny, you know, 'cause that chain is "dead". I kept asking if this was all a joke, if he were actually still alive. He tried showing me that he could put his hand through me, but that didn't work, so he asked me to try and find his pulse, to prove that he didn't have one. Before I could, we were all of the sudden at some like water park/river/obstacle course. He made me lead him through it. I think I was walking along some concrete barrier and snakes kept appearing on it, but slithering out of my way as soon as I got close ( I don't know what the hell that means). Once we accomplished that, we were at some singles-type party, but there were adults there of all ages, races, etc. There were quite a few midgets there too, some that were twins. We went inside the building and all of the sudden, Andrew disappeared. I soon found his cell phone in my bag, which had somehow taken pictures of text messages on my phone (wtf). Eventually, I wondered around long enough (without asking anyone "have any of you seen a dead guy? About 6'4"?) Then we ended up back in his car and drove back to the apartment. I asked him something like "What happens now?" His response? "I'll be around."

-CUT TO REAL LIFE-

Today is Andrew's birthday.

I have to stop eating so much sugar.

and all that jazz

2009-03-26T19:42:00.002-04:00

I have nothing of note to say, really.

I went to Thai Spoon last night with Chelsea and Charles. It was oh so good this time. Vanessa called during dinner to tell me that she started reading my blog and really enjoys it (thanks, Vanessa!) I then went to Borders to listen to bluegrass and look for the newest issue of Paste, D.C. Matt recommended. He told he it had a CD in it like the last issue I bought. I went and looked through all the copies they had, not one had a CD. I even asked the cashier, thinking maybe they would give them out as people bought them. She did not know anything about the magazine. I was also this whole time trying to avoid eye contact with the guitarist from one of Wyatt's bands, hoping he would not recognize me or my "why the hell are you playing the guitar like that" face. I bought the latest In Style (only because I felt bad for asking the cashier a question and then just leaving-I cannot tell you how many guilt purchases I have made) and went to Barnes and Noble, where I bought my first issue of Paste, with a CD.

I got there and looked through their copies, NO CD. Wtf. Finally, as I should have done 30 minutes previously, I read through the section with the music sampler.

It includes a code to download the sampler online.

Oops.

I also ended up buying a book called Flapper. That whole era of the wild girl whathaveyou really intrigues me.

I also skipped my afternoon classes today. Because it was raining.

I will probably skip Italian tomorrow too. Because it will be raining. And Professoressa drives me insane.

BUT TOMORROW NIGHT I AM GOING DANCING AGAIN AND I SO CANNOT WAIT RAIN OR MOONSHINE.

Have a good day.

voltage running through her skin

2009-03-23T15:04:00.004-04:00

I had like THE best weekend ever.

Ajyra's roommate Maddie had her birthday party at Go Bar on Saturday night and....

IT HAD A THEME.

I am a sucker for any function that is themed, and this one did not disappoint. The theme was a video, "Electric Feel" by MGMT, which if you have never heard the song, please oh please listen to it NOW. Along with that, you could incorporate themes from the movie Hook. So...

I wore a feathered headdress and painted a big strip of blue and pink across my eyes. I wore a plaid shirt, black pants and silver heels. And motorcycle gloves.

I am a badass.

It took about an hour for the party to really get started, but once it did, oh man, it was intense. I danced like I have never danced before. The music, the people, everything was just so perfect and fun.

Electric.

this makes me want to eat a cheeseburger

2009-03-21T11:14:00.002-04:00

No seriously, this is one of the most disgusting things I have ever seen.

http://ca.askmen.com/top_10/dating/top-10-subtle-ways-to-tell-her-shes-getting-fat_10.html

color me angry

2009-03-20T23:05:00.002-04:00

I know it has been a while since I last posted, I apologize. I can't help it if I'm totally popular and have been busy every night this week. Well, really just Wednesday and last night, Monday and Tuesday were spent doing homework and right now I am in bed, as I have been since around 7pm. So I'm really not popular, just busy. I did spend last weekend in Atlanta, Wednesday I spent with some old friends and one marginally attractive new friend and last night I had a fun night with my Chelsea and my neighbors. But let me tell you why I'm angry.

First let say that the last time I posted, I asked for suggestions on my best post. You know who responded? ONE person. And thank you, Leah, for your ever diligent willingness to give me feedback, I cannot tell you how appreciative I am. And to the rest of you who read it and have been reading this, thanks a lot. Sarcastically.

On Tuesday, I awoke to discover that my kitchen sink was not working. Water was not draining, which I believe was caused by a large amount of greasy food put down the sink. You can guess who did that. Anyway, I tried and tried to get it fixed and could not on my own. I called my landlady on Wednesday and she didn't really say it would be fixed, just thanks for telling her there was a problem. Dammit. Thursday between classes, when the sink was still clogged, I had cereal for lunch. Not knowing when I would eat dinner, I decided to have a second bowl of cereal before my next class. There were two bottles of milk in the fridge, one was mine, which was good and one was Parker's that was very much expired. I was not paying attention and I grabbed the first one I saw and poured it over my heaping bowl of cereal. When I was putting the milk back, I noticed that I got it from the front of the shelf, not the back. I had poured rancid milk over my cereal. Not being able to put the waste down the sink like I normally would have done, I walked out my front door and poured the cereal next to the bushes next to the porch railing. I guess that is kind of trashy, but I didn't think much of it. As I was leaving for my class, the plumber showed up and when I got home, it was fixed.

I have been so tired all day. I went to Italian and then work and FINALLY, I got to come home. Neighbor Andrew's girlfriend Ashley came up from Savannah for the weekend, and she brought her cute little dog, Marla. Also in dog news, Matt and Andrew adopted the cutest little puppy and brought him home today. He is some sort of pit bull mix (we think) and has blue eyes! Oh so cute. I didn't play much with them when I got home, but hope to soon. Anyway, the anger.

Neighbor Matt sends me a text that says "You have now made two dogs sick with your cheerios. You might consider doing something about that".

Expletive. Expletive. Expletive.

My response was, "Maybe you should prevent the dogs from eating them". Maybe a little immature, but it really pissed me off.

He said something about having to then micromanage the dogs even more than they already are having to.

Ok.

#1 YOU JUST BROUGHT HOME A MONTH OLD PUPPY YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE TO LOOK AFTER IT. That made me furious. Sure, I put food outside. But I think any fool knows that DOGS TRY AND EAT THINGS THEY FIND ON THE GROUND. Cheerios are probably the LAST thing he should be worried about.

#2 I wonder if the excitement of being a new environment could, I don't know, make a dog feel ill?

#3 How in the hell are cheerios going to make a dog sick? THEY EAT OTHER DOGS POOP. WASTE. I don't think some oats will make them sick.

#4 The boys have had that dog a few hours and are already blaming someone else for the behavior of their dog?

Like I said, I have been super tired all day and consequently have been in a bad mood, all day. I have not wanted to talk to other people, look at other people. And I certainly don't want to be blamed for a puppy's upset stomach.

Grr. Argh.

simply the best

2009-03-13T23:10:00.003-04:00

Hello my friends that follow my blog, and any strangers that follow it as well. I've been thinking a lot lately about how one day I really want to write a book, and I've done a good job so far of documenting my life, so I have plenty of material. I do feel that I need to increase my blog readership A. because I'm kind of vain and want people to tell me how funny and I am and B. because it would only help my book-writing situation.

What I am asking of you, then, is to tell me which of my postings you think is the best. I'm going to post it as a note on facebook. If you recall, the last time I did that, I got a HUGE response. Granted, it was about the election and EVERYONE has a damn opinion about politics, and fewer people have an opinion about my life; however, I think if I post it on facebook, more people will see it, more people will read this, one day I'll be Carrie Bradshaw etc etc. SO, if you could, please comment here which post you liked the most. I would really appreciate it.

PS I'm going to hotlanta this weekend with Chelsea to spend some time with our friend-turned-grown up Kendra. I hope we will do something worth mentioning here. We usually do something ridiculous OR we just sit around and do nothing. I'll let you know what happens.

take me to the river

2009-03-12T14:24:00.003-04:00

I have a 1 1/2 year old black lab puppy. I use the word "have" loosely. I acquired her, but she now lives with my mother after a heated custody battle. However, it is in the best interest of said puppy that she live in a large house with people who can constantly pay attention to her instead of with a college student. This is my Dagny, just under a year ago:

I made a deal with my mother that yesterday, I could have Dagny for the day. I picked her up and we set off.

First, we took a stroll through the intramural trails. She seemed to quite enjoy that, but I had to keep her on her leash, which I don't think she appreciated.

After the trails, we came home and took a nap. Nothing says leisure like a nap right before lunch.

We got up, ate lunch, let Neighbor Matt put his glasses on Dagny and exclaim how smart she was, and headed to one of our favorite spots. The river. I'm not really sure what river it is, it is on the east side, less than half a mile from where I used to live. There is a handy walking trail right next to the water and it is quite lovely. I used to take her there often when she lived with me, and we had a lot of fun there together. As soon as we get to a certain point, far enough away from the road, I let her off her leash to run and jump in the river as she likes. There is one spot that I really like, where a tree has fallen out over the water. I like to go there and sit while she swims. Near the tree, there is a large rock, in the middle of the river. A large portion of it is above the water and ever since the first time I saw that rock, I wanted to conquer it. I knew today would be the day.

In my thin cotton sundress (really not appropriate attire for traipsing through the woods and/or a river), I first stepped in and sat on the tree. I then swung my legs over the trunk and cautiously felt the rocks beneath my bare feet. It took a while to get through the water that way, finding good footing before each step. I walked over rocks and sand and algae and finally, I made it to my rock. I immediately lay down on the rock, stretching my whole body out. It felt so exhilarating. There I was, just me and my dog, on top of the rushing water, basking in the spring sun. Granted, there was a bridge visible from where we were basking, and I was worried that my reflective-pale skin would blind the drivers, or that they would think I was a corpse washed upon the rocks. With a dog. Anyway, it was a beautiful moment. It felt so good to just be there, in nature. I didn't want to leave.

But I soon realized that I was in the direct sunlight, not wearing all that much and my poor pale skin was probably roasting. And it was, I have a strange looking sunburn on my chest, arms and legs.

Exhausted from our play together, Dagny and I drove back to Danielsville. We parted ways and I was so happy to have spent the day with such a beautiful and loving animal.

are you that singer girl?

2009-03-09T18:52:00.003-04:00

What a crazy last couple of days it has been. Friday morning I had an Italian test, and after that, it was non-stop party. And by "party" I mean doing whatever I want instead of studying. Which, come to think of it, is kind of what I do all the time. Oops.

Friday night, I went out with my friends Charles and Chelsea. We had dinner at Clocked. Oh. My. Gosh. I have not had a cheeseburger that good since...I don't know when. We then went to Flicker, where they had no popcorn and the chairs were uncomfortable, but all of that was made up for by some very cute boys playing some fun songs.

Saturday, I did very little. I rented a bunch of movies, ate cheesecake and then watched lots of Seinfeld. I then went to Neighbor Matt's to play Apples to Apples and we then went to see Watchmen. Now, I am probably the least nerdy out of this circle of my friends, and I'm not saying that as some sort of superlative, just stating an attribute. That being said, I LOVED THAT MOVIE. It was beautiful. Visually. It was very violent and there were some kind of awkward/I'mnotsureiftheyweresupposedtobethiswaybut comical love scenes. Overall, a good film. Daylight savings time hit and I didn't end up going to bed until after 4am.

Woke up Sunday at almost 1pm. Yikes. I got up, did some cleaning. Mom asked if I wanted to go to her house for pot roast. Um...yes! It was sooooo good. Like so so so good. I can't even describe it.

Today, though, I had to work. At our sister store, Off Campus. Which I always feel tense in, like everything I'm doing is wrong. Oh well, work today is done and I only have tomorrow and then the rest of the week off.

Is it just me, or does anyone else really hate those pictures on Facebook with all the cartoon characters with labels like "the smart one" and "the rebel"? I get irritated every time I log on and see a new one. Thankfully, no one has tagged me in one yet. I would have to be labeled as "the bitchy one" after they did.

If I wasn't labeled that already.

are the bangs shorter?

2009-03-04T23:53:00.002-05:00

I only have seven minutes to make my Wednesday deadline....

I got a lovely haircut today. I went with the bang look again. I tried taking pictures, but I mostly look weird or bald. But I am happy with it. Finally, bangs done by a professional. Not in a bathroom and not with craft scissors. Le sigh.

Also, I just returned from seeing The Reader. One of the most beautiful and heart-wrenching films I have seen. Simply beautiful. Maybe I will one day get sick on someone's staircase and then have a summer affair with them until they run off to join the Nazi party and I don't find out about it until I'm in law school but my lover won't admit that they cannot read or write...but that is not likely to happen. Like I would get into law school.

the woods are lovely, dark and deep

2009-03-02T11:12:00.008-05:00

OF COURSE I have to post about the March snowstorm of 2009. First day of March and what do we get? Several inches of snow. My heart was all a flutter when the rain started turning into snow, with the prospect of the light dusting we usually get if it snows.

And it just kept snowing.

I live kind of in front of the intramural trails, and they are lovely any time of year, but one day as I was walking them I thought, "If it ever snows, this is the first place I am coming". I bundled up (as best I could...I quickly realized I'm really not prepared for this kind of weather) and headed to the woods. It was breathtaking. What is it about snow that makes everything beautiful?

Those are just a couple of my (poor quality) pictures I took. All of them are on Facebook, if you're interested. I'm about to go to Danielsville to spend the day with my family, and will probably take more there.

Oh and to mention food....

We had now power between 4pm and sometime before 5am this morning. I had a peanut butter sandwich and some cheese its for dinner last night. Yep. Was not happy about that. BUT, I had that meal while playing Apples to Apples with my neighbors. By candle light. : ]

stumble & bramble

2009-02-27T21:46:00.003-05:00

As you may recall, I purchased for myself a lovely ring for Valentine's Day. Also for V day I decided to splurge on some hair care. I bought for myself some bumble and bumble shampoo, conditioner and styling creme.

And I hate it.

It makes my hair feel sticky and gross. It looks pretty good, but it feels awful. I much prefer my $3 bottle of anythingotherthanthis.

My reason for posting, however, is to see if anyone wants to buy this stuff off of me. I know, I know, I just spent three sentences describing how much I hate it. But let me say this-bumble and bumble is a great product. Just not for me. Why am I trying to sell it instead of giving it away? This stuff is expensive. For me, anyway. $20 a bottle. SO....

shampoo $10

conditioner $10

styling creme $10

Or make me a better offer. The bottles are like 7/8 full and there is probably a year's worth of styling creme left in that tiny bottle. If you want more information on these particular products, you can visit bumbleandbumble.com

How tacky is this? Very. Somebody buy this stuff before I'm forced to shave my legs with it.

barf

2009-02-26T23:48:00.002-05:00

Ok, I couldn't let this slip past. I want anyone who reads my blog to read this article. Just like that ad I mentioned earlier today, this sort of thing really pisses me off. Not the article, the article is well done, but the subject of the article. Contests? To see who can be the skinniest? Who can eat the least?

Grrr.

The very first girl mentioned is 15. FIFTEEN. Dammit, these girls keep getting younger and younger. You know, I had to work for several years to not hate myself because I wasn't tall and skinny and it was so hard. It took a lot of work. But all I can think about is my little sister. I don't want her to feel that this is acceptable, I don't want her to ever think that she needs to torture her body to be beautiful. It breaks my heart to think that someone I love might feel this way, and it scares me to read articles like this because it could totally happen. Please, if you suspect that someone you know is suffering from this, talk to them. And please don't continue or support a dialogue that reinforces this behavior.

http://www.nytimes.com/2006/04/02/fashion/sundaystyles/02BREAK.html?_r=1&scp=2&sq=anorexia&st=cse

PS I just noticed that this article was written in 2006. I'd like to see some statistics for 2009.

wtf prevage?

2009-02-26T12:42:00.002-05:00

I was flipping through the March issue of In Style yesterday when I came upon an ad for Prevage "total transforming anti-aging moisturizer". I've seen ads for this brand of product before, but nothing like this. I'm sorry, I looked for a picture of the ad but couldn't find one to put on here, so I will describe it to you.

IT IS A PICTURE OF A MANNEQUIN.

At first, I thought it was a nude woman. BUT NO, it is a mannequin.

Ok, I almost went on a tirade at work yesterday, but wanted to keep my composure in front of customers. But let me just say that THIS PISSES ME OFF.

First, ads had pictures of ideal women trying to sell a product. Then, ads had ideal women with lots of makeup on to try and sell a product. THEN, ads had ideal women with lots of makeup and hair and computer enhancements made trying to sell a product. The point of all of this? "Buy this product and you can look like me! (i.e. ideal)". What is the problem with this method of advertising?

THESE ARE NOT ACTUAL WOMEN.

Ok, maybe they used to be, but today, the images we see are a construct of feminine looking body parts pasted together to look convincingly like one, complete PACKAGE. This is a problem because women and girls see these images, purported as ideal, and want to look like them. However, they cannot look like them because it is not an image of a real woman, it is a fabrication. And that really, really makes me angry.

So imagine my anger when I open to an ad WITH A FAKE WOMAN. Prevage has bypassed the airbrushing and photoshopping in favor of a mannequin. Why is this a problem? Because this is not a real woman. You cannot look like her. Your skin will never be as smooth as that of a mannequin. But prevage will get you pretty damn close.

Aside from giving women yet another reason to hate their real bodies, this is just poor advertising. Yes, the skin of a mannequin is SMOOTH, but it is also HARD. I guess they were going for the firming aspect, but no one wants hard, plastic skin. Does anyone want to actually look like a mannequin? Well, I can think of one person:

But I digress.

I don't feel as though I have fully articulated my anger and disgust. Just know that I am hella mad about this ad and ones like it. And please do not buy this product. You don't want to look like posh spice, do you?

is this your lunch?

2009-02-23T21:31:00.003-05:00

I was sick like all last week. Gross. I didn't go grocery shopping last week since my eating was kind of sporadic. Thursday rolled around and I really didn't have any food to eat for lunch. I had some pop tarts. I only really like s'mores pop tarts, but I won't eat them unless I have a diet coke too.

They taste better that way.

But I didn't have any diet coke in my apartment. I decided that I would run to the gas station near my house to get a can of coke for lunch. While walking to my car, I saw an empty doritos bag. Cooler ranch, my favorite. I then decided that my perfect lunch would include s'mores pop tarts, cooler ranch doritos and a diet coke. I then headed to my destination.

Ok, let me say here that last Thursday was like super windy. My hair was blowing all over the place. AND I was recovering from my weird cold thing; so I probably didn't look my BEST, but I didn't think I looked bad. Ok, back to the story.

I went in to the gas station, got my diet coke and chips, and went to the cashier.

Hello, how are you, fine thanks, blah blah

He then says to me, "Are you sick?"

Wtf, dude? Did he not realize that by saying those words to me, he said to me "YOU LOOK AWFUL!"

I just kind of laughed and said something stupid like "Yeah, I've been sick for about a week now..."

"Oh yeah, everyone is sick now...cough...fever..."

"Yep."

pause...and I think I am done with awkward conversation....

"Is this your lunch?"

DAMMIT! How did he know?? Was it the sweat pants? Or the mussed hair? I felt more defeated than anything-was my purpose so clear to him? I could sense the judgement in his voice...so I quickly had to come up with a response...

"Oh, no, just a quick snack between classes."

"Oh, of course. I hope you feel better before the weekend."

(I think it is cute that he hoped I felt better before the weekend-anyone wearing sweat pants in the middle of the day that is suspected of having doritos and coke for lunch probably does not have a big weekend planned. Jerk.)

what white teeth you have

2009-02-21T16:19:00.002-05:00

Sorry this is late, guys. I had a crazy busy day yesterday.

After I graduated high school, I kind of became obsessed with having white teeth. Ok maybe not obsessed as I did not stem my cola consumption nor did I increase the number of times I brushed my teeth, but I did only buy whitening toothpaste, and soon moved on to white strips. I have only used the kind that you put on your teeth for 30 minutes for like 2 weeks, I've used the Crest kind and the Target brand version of the same product. Both were easy to use and had good results. Since then, I've done a pretty good job of keeping up with keeping my teeth white.

I have also found a toothpaste that I LOVE. I read a review of it in Bust magazine and had to try it and I love love love it.

Elgydium, French toothpaste. The only problem is I cannot find it anywhere in a store, so I had to order it from drugstore.com. Totally worth it. Smile!

I believe I can fly

2009-02-18T17:36:00.002-05:00

I was trying to figure out a format for my blog and I had narrowed it down to this:

Mondays-food related

Fridays-products I liked

But what to do about Wednesday? I consulted my friend Leah after she mentioned my blog, and she really likes it when I talk about things I don't like. Another blog I like is feministing.com and they have what they call "Friday Feminist F$@* You", so I could have "WTF Wednesday". As I couldn't really think of something I really hated today (except being sick-ish still) and I didn't think Leah would approve of my use of the phrase "WTF", I decided to blog about something else.

I grew up in a very small town with very small people. Many of them had been in Danielsville most of their life and they were content with what they had. The thought of this terrified me. It wasn't until late highschool/college that I realized that I do not have to live that way. Thank goodness. I plan on exploring the world around me and all that it has to offer, and developing many talents. Today, world, I share with you my life goals that I have come up with thus far.

#1 Speak the following languages fluently:

-Italian

-French

-Spanish

#2 Visit all seven continents (yes, including Antarctica)

#3 Own a great piece of art

#4 Create something beautiful

#5 Learn to play the piano

#6 Learn to play the violin

#7 Learn to sail

#8 Own horses and know how to ride

#9 Take a drawing class

#10 Take a painting class

#11 Go skydiving

That is really all I have come up with so far. Some of them will be much easier to achieve. I'm on my way to speaking Italian, which will make learning Spanish easy, and I have a (vague) background in French. I've been to one continent, so that's a good start. All of the "learn to"s may have to wait until I have a real job with real money so I can take real classes. I can take a drawing class while I'm still in school. Someday I can do all of these things, and much more. It will be fun.

get down with the sickness

2009-02-16T20:28:00.002-05:00

Every person around me is sick. Someone's throat hurts, someone's nose is runny. Everyone is ailing. Including me. It began last Thursday with an innocent lil cough, which quickly turned into a big cough. I felt better Saturday, and then felt fever-ish Saturday night (maybe because it was Valentine's Day...) and lay in bed sick all day Sunday. While I was laying in bed sick all day Sunday, I was constantly drinking something. Water, orange juice, water, tea, water. All day. Which did have a positive effect, it liquified all of the snot in my body. All of it. Which is now pouring out of my body at a fairly constant rate. Enough even to warrant the use of a handkerchief today, which made me feel first kind of distinguished because I was using a handkerchief and then made me feel disgusting because I was basically wallowing in my snot all day.

I had thought that every Monday I would blog what I ate that day, as that got a lot of response the last time I did it. So here is what I ingested today:

water

tea

water

tea

juice

water

crackers

tea

water

Ok, that is kind of exaggerating. I did have tuna for lunch. But I am pretty sure I had more liquid today than solid. I am so tired of constantly blowing my nose, I wish this would stop.

Is this gross, y'all? Sorry if it is. Love you, mean it.

witchy woman

2009-02-14T13:14:00.002-05:00

One day, I was sitting in Italian, talking with another girl in my class. As I was talking to her, she was staring quite intently at my face and as soon as I stopped talking, she breathed, "You have like perfect skin. What do you use?"

I explained to her that my skin did not clear up until I was about 22 and that it took a strong cocktail of proactive and birth control to get to this point.

Now that my skin has stopped revolting, I am able to use products that I like. I love Aveeno and Khiels. One of my favorite products, though, is something that I came across last fall and had not heard of before and I LOVE IT.

I bought this at a little boutique in Comer, Georgia (which has since moved to Ila, Georgia), but Earthfare also carries a couple of their products. This witch hazel is so...refreshing. I don't know how else to describe it. Everyone should try it. Earthfare doesn't have the lavender, but they do have the rose petal, which is also very nice. What better way to boost the economy than to support small business and have great looking (and feeling!) skin? Go get some.

lesson learned

2009-02-11T21:23:00.003-05:00

One of my neighbors is very sick. No, not the one who refused to go to Applebee's with me. The other Matt that lives next door. He has been in and out of the hospital since sometime late last semester. He is now in ICU and is not expected to live much longer. His condition is the result of an infection after a surgery, which then led to the failure of several body systems. His options have come down to a decision on if he wants to die in hospice care or with his family.

It is a very sad situation. However, I didn't know him very well, so I can really only offer support to my other neighbor Matt who is pretty upset. Therein lies the lesson to be learned. I have lived next door to this man since September of 2008 and know almost nothing about him. All I know is that he cooks well and plays the piano beautifully. He would often cook things and bring them to Parker and me, and sometimes, I could hear him playing the piano if my apartment was quiet. And he has a little chihuahua named Dylan. That is really all I know about this young man who now lays dying. What effort on my part would it have taken to stop and chat more when I would find him sitting outside? Why didn't I invite him over for dinner? Why don't I take the time to know the people around me?

Cliche as this all may sound, this situation has been a real kind of shock for me. Not necessarily about the dire circumstances of this man's health, but more of my own reclusiveness, if that's even applicable. I didn't take the time to get to know the person living ten feet away from me, and now the chances of me getting to know him are almost zero. May I in the future be more friendly and reach out to those close to me. I can only pray now that his pain will be little and that his family will find comfort.

male monday

2009-02-09T19:40:00.002-05:00

That is supposed to be pronounced "mall-ay", as in bad. Not male. Monday did not directly involve any males.

What a suck day. My back has been KILLING me for almost a week now and today was no exception. I went to Italian, which was fine. After that, I went to eat my lunch before my ecology lab. I make myself eat tuna for lunch on Mondays, 'cause you know, it's good for you, but I always feel kind of like a jerk for eating it in a public setting. I personally have grown not to HATE the smell of tuna like I used to, but I'm sure others do not feel the same way. Eating tuna on the second floor of the SLC at one of the study tables just feels so mean. I looked for a seat in the Jittery Joe's section, nothing. I then looked for a study room, that would trap in the smell. Nothing, just a bunch of jerks who were in the rooms alone. So I sat and ate my pungent lunch across from a young man studying. Le sigh.

Then, I spent the next two hours at a water treatment plant. I was in WASTE for TWO HOURS. Granted, I did spend oh....one hour and 53 minutes fantasizing about my ecology TA, but we were still surrounded by crap. Ick.

-Brief respite from suck day between lab and work when I came home and took a nap-

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

I got some heat sticky things for my back and large amounts of processed sugar and went to work. Which wasn't all that bad. All I could think about though was how bad I wanted to go to Applebee's after work for dinner.

Let me say something here. I really don't like Applebee's, or places like unto it. However, due to the joys of advertising, I saw a commercial for some steak deal they were having and just had to go and eat steak. It looked so good. So I asked my neighbor if he would go with me, as he is out of my 4 friends the one who is not a vegetarian. We made kind of a standing date to go, whenever both of us had the time or the money.

I texted him earlier in the day and asked if he would want to go. He said maybe, and I saw him after lab and he said he would let me know. I sent him another text around 7pm all but begging him to go with me, as it had been a bad day and all I wanted was cow. His response?

I already made dinner plans.

Wtf? I thought WE made dinner plans. It made me irrationally angry. So here I sit, hungry and in pain, with a long list of things to get done. I think I'm just going to order some pizza and watch The Mummy instead of doing any of it. Blech.

Could be an organ donor the way I give up my heart

2009-02-06T11:36:00.001-05:00

I hate Valentine's Day. Like, I really hate it. I have for quite some time. Like, my senior year of high school, my friends and I developed this "Anti-Valentine Warrior" thing and made signs and everything. Some may say that as a feminist, I shouldn't be worried about something as silly as a holiday like this, that being single is totally cool and I should not let this DAY OF REMINDER get me down. But ohhh it does. I tend to get sad and boo-hoo and gorge myself for pretty much a week. I would like to say that as I have aged, that I have (hopefully) gotten more mature.

I have not.

Instead, I have taken to purchasing for myself gifts. As there is no "man in my life" to buy me things (isn't that what a man is for?), I just buy things on my own. This Valentine's Day, I bought myself this pretty little something.

I bought it from skinnystyle.com and I cannot wait to get it in the mail.

You should all listen to Andre 3000's Happy Valentine's Day. It adequately sums up my feelings about February 14.

my nail beds suck

2009-02-04T11:36:00.004-05:00

First of all, I am never mentioning my diet coke consumption ever again.

Sunday morning, my older brother/roommate got super drunk and decided that he needed to talk to me for several hours about his ex-girlfriend, the moon, the Joker, magic, the Joker and drugs. Once I kicked him out of my room, I finished drying my hair and had to leave the apartment before I broke something of his in a fit of rage. As I couldn't get in touch with my family to see if there were home, I decided to pass my time at Target. Sam wanted some pants for his birthday, I wanted to look at throw pillows and lip gloss, etc etc. I got Sammy's pants (only after very detailed instructions from him as I realized I know nothing about how to shop for men's clothing) and wandered around the store after prying from my hands several scarves, bags and sandals. I then thought that maybe some new hair accessories would brighten my day.

I walked to the hair accessory aisle and saw what appeared to be a family. A man, a woman, and what looked like three 8-9 year old girls. I was looking around, trying my best to ignore them, when I saw that the group of young girls were all crowded around those hand held mirrors. I then heard the following exchange:

"Ohmygosh, look at my eyebrows. I totally have a unibrow."

"No, will you look at my skin? Ugh."

Just to be clear, this was coming from the LITTLE GIRLS, not the adults. I have a very hard time keeping my thoughts to myself, because even if I am silent, my facial expressions have a tendency to rat me out. By this time, I had fully turned my whole body to face this group of girls and was staring at them, mouth agape. The girls did not see me, and neither did the adults, and I turned quickly on my heel and walked away.

Now, if any of you have ever even mentioned anything remotely concerning women and body image issues, you have probably heard my 30 minute tirade about the subject. I HAVE A BIG PROBLEM WITH IT. I so wish we could live in a world where EVERY PERSON, male or female, could believe that they were beautiful. I have listened to countless friends talk about how they wish they could change this or that about their bodies, but most of my friends are adults.

THESE WERE CHILDREN.

Not teens, not even tweens, these were little girls, who should not need to worry about their looks past the point of have I brushed my hair in the last week and am I wearing shoes. It makes me so sad to hear people my own age berate themselves, but little girls? If we start hating ourselves at nine, what's next?

because you want more

2009-02-03T10:03:00.003-05:00

My mentoROY told me that if I want to be a successful blogger, I have to be more consistent in my postings. People respond well to that, he says. I now make a commitment to you, blogging community, to write something every Monday, Wednesday and Friday, and maybe weekends. At least for like the next week.

As it is obviously Tuesday, I have already failed you.

Today I will be telling you what I ate yesterday. Since people are interested in what celebrities eat, and I might as well be a celebrity, I will tell you what I ate yesterday. If you hate it I will never do it again. Give me FEEDback (get it, because it's about food....)

1 whole wheat bagel with cream cheese

1 small glass of grape juice

1 package of Albacore tuna with mayonnaise and relish

6 crackers

5 strawberries

3 squares of dark chocolate

1 20 oz bottle of diet coke

1 small cup of chocolate pudding

6 swiss on wheat crackers

1 can of diet coke

1 ham and mozzarella quesadilla

1 can of diet coke

water>diet coke I promise

Does it light up?

2009-02-01T19:51:00.004-05:00

Buckle up kids, this is going to be a long one.

In my honest efforts to date only LDS men instead of picking up a frat boy at a bar to fulfill my physical desires, I have not dated a lot of men. There was Mike the physical therapist, Aaron the guyIwasntreallydatingbutspentthenightathishousealot and Miles, aka Stephen Colbert. And probably a couple of other guys I'm probably forgetting.

I've been on a lot of first dates.

There was also Derek. Except I didn't really date Derek. I met Derek in 2004 at a church dance or on an lds singles website or some other way Mormons desperately try to meet each other. He is from a town in northwest Georgia, as I live in northEAST Georgia and so we didn't spend a lot of time together. We did go to my stake's conference together, and that was fun and we totally wanted to kiss as we were saying goodbye but we didn't blahblahblah. BUT, because we lived so far away from each other, nothing really happened. We talked often online and called sometimes, but no real established connection.

Cut to December, 2006.

Derek and I had been talking and we were discussing how we both really wanted to kiss each other back in spring 2004. We then decided it would be a good idea to get together just to make out. Since we lived so far away from each other, we didn't want to have any sort of relationship, but we did want to kiss. Each other. It was then decided that I would be the lucky one to drive all the way across the state for said ncmo. I did, and it was fun, but I wasn't swooning or anything.

March, 2007.

I had decided that I would go to Charleston for spring break (ah the beginning of my love affair with Charleston...le sigh...) and Derek and I were talking and thought it would be fun if he went too. It would be cheaper, I would feel safer with another person, etc etc. SO we decided he would come here and we would go on a date to discuss it (ie see if we wanted to spend a few days together in a new city).

Let me interject something here.

In 2004, I was pretty young and immature. I though that if ANY lds guy paid attention to me, I should totally date him, because we were both Mormon, it would work out. Don't get me wrong, I liked Derek, he was funny and cute. Come 2007, though, 2007 was the year of Benjamin and women's studies and my super long hot hair. 2007 was a year of finding myself, who I was, what I wanted from myself and life. I was more independent, more outspoken and more liberal and more stylish. That being said, back to the March 2007 date.

The man showed up to my house wearing a leather blazer. A LEATHER BLAZER. "Do they even make those?", you ask? Yes, they do. He also got in my car and said "Do we really have to listen to Frank Sinatra?" Ahhh helll no. Needless to say, the date did not go well, and he did not go to Charleston with me. Which was actually fantastic, I learned a lot about myself driving to a strange, new place, alone. And I'm not saying that to sound CLICHE, I really mean it. That trip taught me a lot. But I digress.

Now to the present, January 2008

I started thinking about Derek and how we never really went on a "real" date (which isn't really true, please see March 2007). Our branch was having an activity, and I thought it would be fun if he came to be my date. I even told him he could spend the night at my apartment if he wanted, because it was such a long drive home. And so the fun begins.

I opened the door and all I saw was goatee and polo. Keep in mind that by January 2008, I am in full democrat mode, my hair has grown back out and I'm ALMOST back to babe status. I ain't got time for no goatee and polo. On that poor grammar note, I had forgotten what a HICK Derek is. I guess my 2004 naiveté had blocked that. He is a sixth grade English teacher and talks like such a redneck. Remember how I said that he could spend the night at my house? I like to think of the night progressing in this pattern: Before he got there, he was going to sleep in my bed. When I opened the door, he was sleeping on the floor. He only gets further and further away from my bed as the night progresses.

We had some time to kill, so we went to the zoo, where he made fun of Athens' small zoo which houses animals native to Georgia, which I honestly find fascinating. We then went to dinner, where he didn't talk much. I tried SO hard to carry the conversation, asking him about his students, what he was teaching, comparing Italian grammar to what he was teaching. Nothing. Then, finally, we went to the institute to meet everyone else. SALVATION.

The basketball game wasn't that bad. I sat between him and Joseph Scott (the funniest man alive) and I spent more time talking to Joseph than Derek. At one point, I asked Derek to go and get me a drink so that I could express to Mallori my dilemma of how to make him go home (Mal had met him in 2004 at stake conference). We left the game and Steph wanted to go to Cali n' Titos. Even though we had already eaten, and even though I knew I was going to make this man drive home and it was after 8pm (he lives about 3 hours away) I said yes we were going to A. delay the awkward "you can't stay here" routine and B. guava empanadas. And then, what happened next, almost had me storming off, leaving him in an ambiguously Latin restaurant which he referred to as an "eyesore".

The man pronounced the word "salmon" as SALLMAN. HE PRONOUNCED THE "L" IN SALMON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HE TEACHES SIXTH GRADE ENGLISH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I publicly and loudly corrected him, making sure to sound as condescending as possible. We sat down, where Stephanie, the genius that she is, asked Robbie if she could sit next to me, which led to me sitting as far away from Derek as possible. We left at like 9:30 and drove back to my apartment, my mind reeling as to what I was going to say. I was just going to say it in the car and get it over with. We stopped, and before I took the key out of the ignition, he was out of the car. Dammit.

He walked over to his trunk and I just blurted out, "I know I said you could spend the night here, but...." at which point I trailed off. He then said, "Ok. I'll just get you what I brought you". About a month ago, he had told me he had something to give me. He opens his suitcase and pulls out a Georgia cup. Which pissed me off because anyone who knows me would know that would piss me off. He said he won it at some teacher auction thing, and thought of me. Inside the cup were some magnets, Georgia gum. And a keychain. Let me say, on our first "date" (stake conference) he brought me a keychain that had my name on it, because I had told him it was difficult for me to find keychains with my name on it. This keychain, however, did not have my name on it.

It said "kiss me".

Panic.

"Does it light up?" (what the hell,Bonnie).

"I think it does, but I think you have to be a certain temperature."

Zing.

My response?

"May I offer you a caffeinated beverage?"

I have not heard from him since.

That frat boy keeps looking better and better.

no problem, babe

2009-01-31T23:29:00.002-05:00

Roi (grr):

I regret to inform you that I will not be updating my blog as thoroughly as I promised. I know this is no way to gain a career in blogging, by not meeting my deadlines, but it is now 11:30, and I need to be asleep in 15 minutes in order to get 8 hours of sleep. I'm kind of adamant about that. You understand; my relationship with sleep is kind of like your relationship to the Manhattan. Except my sleep doesn't involve alcohol. Most of the time. I do hope that sometime tomorrow I can find the time to pen the saga of the leather blazer, but until then, I hope this will suffice. Save me a Blenheim's and Maker's Mark? But hold the Blenheim's.

Your favorite BSBS employee,

Bonnie

vanity rears its ugly head

2009-01-29T23:34:00.003-05:00

#1 Morgan says I don't post enough.

#2 This "25 Things" thing is all the rage on the facebook, but I know some of you don't partake of the facebook, so I decided to post it on here. Enjoy.

#1 Publix commercials make me cry. Especially the one about the little boy and the cake, and the old couple who make dinner for the young couple. CRY.
#2 I have an acute sense of smell and seek to make myself and my surroundings smell as good as possible. Hard to do with rotting rodents around.
#3 I obsess about my hair. Its like, the only thing going for me and I want it to be super long again.
#4 I did not eat a burrito until I was 22 years old.
#5 I have broken most, if not all, of my fingers.
#6 I love the smell of coffee, but I am not fond of the way it tastes.
#7 In elementary school, I constructed and learned how to play a dulcimer.
#8 I wish I had taken French.
#9 I love the smell of cigars.
#10 I sometimes feel really bad about some of the things I say.
#11 I do not like the Beatles.
#12 I like to get 8 hours of sleep a night, and I could totally go for more.
#13 Marching bands give me goosebumps. Especially really really good ones from like metro atlanta.
#14 I envy people that do not have to work in college.
#15 Charleston, Savannah and New Orleans are my favorite places to be.
#16 Ancient Egypt fascinates me, and has since I was a child.
#17 I do not understand most science.
#18 I've developed an alarming crush on Jon Stewart.
#19 I don't like sushi as much as I tell people I do.
#20 I sometimes cry thinking about how much I miss my dog.
#21 I think about Benjamin everyday.
#22 The members of my family are the most intelligent, funny and creative people I know, and I am humbled and honored to be associated with them.
#23 Sometimes when I use big words, I quietly panic, hoping I used them correctly.
#24 I sweat. A lot.
#25 I don't love enough.

1.21.09

2009-01-24T11:30:00.001-05:00

Oh italiano. In my supreme laziness, I took the bus to the SLC. Why is this lazy, you might ask? Because it means I will take the bus back to my apartment, in order to avoid having to walk up that damn hill in the bitter cold. Yes, my laziness has reached a new low. Have I mentioned how much of my time Italian is attempting to take? Oh, it is a lot. Homework, workbook, online exercises. And at some point, I guess I will study for the test I have next Friday. Yeah, that's right. It is really pissing me off. I ran home, rearranged my room, and went to work to inhale deeply the pungent scent of decaying rodent. I had forgotten how strong the smell was. Gross. India told me the sad tale of how her honesty will prevent her from getting a puppy. I attempted to get some reading done at work, but people kept coming in to buy stuff! Eventually I was distracted by the crossword and gave up on homework. I cannot have a repeat of last semester. Must end affair with Jon Stewart.

I think I'm paranoid

2009-01-23T19:28:00.001-05:00

Chelsea and I are taking ecology this semester, and our professor is a 60 year old version of Ben Grindle. What is important to note here is that we believe (or have developed a conspiracy theory) that Dr. McArthur's goal with the class is to make us supremely paranoid. That we're going to run out of resources, that they tie babies to chairs in China, you know, those sorts of things. If that was his intent, then he can consider himself a success.

As some of you know, I have an irrational fear of mold. That somehow, mold will kill me. We discussed one day in class air-toxins and how there are all sorts of diseases out yonder that can infect you without you realizing it until its too late and then you're dead. Well. We had a bunch of mold on our fridge, and since I am scared of mold, I decided to clean it. My thought process, as I am cleaning, went something like this:

"I sure am glad I'm getting rid of this nasty mold so Parker and I can breathe better, and not die from mold. Man, this cleanser stuff really stinks. I hope I can get it all off of the fridge so it doesn't somehow contaminate the food inside the fridge. Oh no, if the smell is so strong, what if it gets in the fridge ANYWAY and poisons all our food? And then we drink the milk and die? What if by removing this mold, I'm actually releasing mold spores into the air, and we will breathe them in and we will die? What if the water in the pitcher is now swimming with this mold and mildew cleanser and MOLDandwe'regoingtodrinkitandeattheeggsandthenwewillbothdieandnoonewillknowbecause

we'rebothintheapartmentahhhahahahha".

I've also decided from that class that i will adopt, at some point, a baby girl from a Chinese orphanage.

Also, to keep you all updated on my work life, remember when I wrote the post about the rat candy (if you haven't read it, you should)? Well, we found one of the rats. After it had gotten drunk off of the apple and orange juice we had stored. And after Eric put out rat poison. Some girl came down the stairs and said, "Your pet rat is on the stairs". Eric promptly collected the stunned rat and disposed of it. COD? Blunt force trauma. However, that is not the end of the tail (get it? TAIL? because rats have long TAILS...and it sounds like TALE which would be the correct word?) The entire store began to REEK of death. Bill Bacon (mmmm....Bacon.....) found a dead rat in the elevator, but the smell remained. We have decided that there is at least one rat dead between the stairs and the wall. Which means we cannot get to it. Which means the entire bookstore smells like death. DEATH. It is disgusting. I cannot remove the stench of decay from my nostrils.

Not only do I work in a place with a rodent problem, I work in a place with a dead rodent problem. Come on, May 2010.....

love on the rocks

2009-01-01T23:15:00.000-05:00

I completely omitted a very funny happening from New Year's Eve. My friends and I went to Aldo's, an Italian restaurant in Atlanta. My darling friend Dave joined us and I begged him to sit next to me so that we could continue whispering witticisms about the people around us. He did sit next to me and soon, our waitress approached.

Russian waitress-"Will you two be on the same ticket?"

American patrons-"No, it will be separate."

American Dave-"She won't marry me."

-laughter from Dave, myself, and whoever else heard it at the table-

Russian waitress-"I hope that is not your final answer."

-embarrassment on my part and more laughter-

American Bonnie-"I'd rather not talk about it." (which I said hoping the Russian waitress would get it that THE WHOLE THING WAS A JOKE)

Dave and I thought it would be funny to allow the waitress to see us holding hands at some point during the meal. So we did. After a lovely meal and conversation, listening to other people discuss their phones and diseases and after I told my friend who is engaged that brown is too a heavy a color to use for a June wedding, our bills came.

I joked and said that mine and Dave's would be a on the same ticket.

My food was on Dave's ticket. Dammit. And he paid for it. Double dammit.

While this was a somewhat awkward experience, I learned a valuable lesson.

Sit next to a man at dinner, hold his hand at some point during the meal, and he just might pay for your food.

love in your mouth

2009-01-01T21:53:00.000-05:00

I had THE MOST amazing breakfast this morning...er...afternoon. I went with a bunch of friends to Atlanta last night to see the Peach Drop (is that a noun or a noun and a verb? Peach drop? or peach drop?) and I'm fairly certain that I spent more time on Marta than actually in downtown Atlanta. Anyway, I didn't go to bed until almost 5am and we all woke up at around noon today STARVING. Being in Atlanta, we had a plethora of options for breakfast type foods at noon. IHOP, Waffle House or...wait for it....

THE FLYING BISCUIT

I had never heard of such a place. My friends Rachel and Lisa were raving about it, how good the grits were and the biscuits. I was picturing some hole in the wall type place like Weaver D's, but we got there and it was a pretty nice, cutesy place. And it is there that I had the most amazing breakfast I have ever eaten.

I got the egg-stravaganza, which came with eggs, bacon, sausage, a biscuit, GRITS and FRENCH TOAST. As you can see, my favorite parts of the meal were the grits and French toast. Now, as some of you may know, I'm kind of a closet grits fanatic. I first had grits from a bagel place here in Athens and they are delicious, with enough cheese in them that it comes off in a long string with the spoon. Then, I was introduced to Carolina style grits. They are kind of whipped, with a consistency similar to mashed potatoes. Flying Biscuit did have shrimp and grits on the menu, and if you've ever been in my presence when the words "shrimp" and "grits" are used together, you've seen me almost weep with sheer joy at the thought of that delectable dish; however, I went with breakfast, but I was sure to order something involving grits. These grits were fantastic. Somewhere between regular grits and Carolina grits, they were warm and thick and perfect. Mmmm. And then, I tried the French toast. OHMYGOSH. It was whole wheat bread with some raspberry something drizzled over it and some other sauce and it was heavenly. It tasted almost like a raspberry cream cheese danish, but better. And less like it came from a gas station.

So while I was eating with my knee jammed up against Lisa's and my fork gouging into Matt's arm, it was perfect. I reckon I done rung in the new year right-friends almost in your lap and really really good breakfast at 1pm.

rat candy

2008-12-28T13:55:00.000-05:00

It has been a month since I last posted anything. Sorry to those who sit and anxiously wait for me to write another witty something, I have let you down.

During finals, the good folks at Pro Copies, located inside Baxter Street Bookstore, keep a large selection of candy for us to eat because we're all stressed out and tired and nothing beats that like mini kit kats. I should also mention that Roy keeps the extra candy in a paper box under the counter (like we don't know it is there). I should also also mention that we have a mouse problem at BSBS. That's right, friends, I work in a place infested with rodents. But I digress.

One day, Chelsea announced to me that the mouse(mice?) had infiltrated the candy box. She had put the box in the refrigerator to prevent further disturbance, but showed me the cardboard crumbs it had left as it chewed through the box lid to swim in chocolate. She then presented me with a moral (health?) dilemma. The candy in the box was undisturbed. No empty wrappers, no chewing, no mouse droppings, nothing. Other than the lid being obviously chewed through, there were no signs that a mouse had scrambled through all that delicious candy. Roy was going to throw it away, and refused to put the candy out for people to eat (Roy has this idea that mice are CONSTANTLY urinating and that all the candy was covered in mouse pee). Chelsea begged him not to throw it away, but to leave it in the fridge, as she would most definitely eat the candy.

At this point, I asked myself, "Am I going to stoop so low as to eat candy that a mouse had walked all over? Candy that a mouse had obviously refused? What should I do?"

And I did what any normal, 23 year old college student would do.

I picked out all the good stuff and kept it in a large jar on my desk. I was never hungry studying. Never.

I was really stressed out and tired.

I think there are bowls in the party packs

2008-11-29T22:23:00.001-05:00

As I have blogged before ( i really hate the verb "blog", btw), I work in a textbook store that so fortunately also sells Georgia CRAP. Therefore, during football season, given our Georgia CRAP and close proximity to the stadium, we are hella busy. We also rent out our parking lot so people can tailgate. There is a 40 year waiting list for the parking spaces. I am so not kidding.

Today was the last home game of the season, against Georgia Tech. We lost, which really isn't important to me. However, it was a very interesting day, as far as football Saturdays go. The last home game that I worked, I was sexually harassed, far beyond the usual casual caress of Old Man #3, which I will not go into, but because of that, I almost refused to work today. As I am hella broke, I thought I would take a chance. I went to work with dirty hair and a pieced together red and black outfit. As I mentioned, our parking lot is full of people, eating and drinking, with people coming and going, stopping by on their way to the game. Let me rephrase that-by "people", I meant to say "upper class white people in large trucks or SUVs". If you live here or have ever been to Baxter Street, you'll know that one section of the housing project is right across the street from the campus, therefore, we see a lot of different people. I'm trying to type this without sounding really rude or racist, because it makes me really sad that we have this tradition of driving excessively large vehicles to a small town, eating and drinking to excess, paying God knows how much to watch young men beat the hell out of each other and completely ignoring the poorest of the poor as you walk past their shoddy homes. That being said, I see a lot of destitute people, but on game days, most of the destitute people I see are Caucasian, dressed in some sort of red and black costume, with a too high credit limit, buying Georgia CRAP instead of better nutrition for their destitute children. Today was different. Today was Brian.

Brian walked into the bookstore around 9:45am. He stood in line to use the restroom and upon exiting the restroom, strolled over to Old Man #3, put his arm around him and said "Go dawgs" (which I said Old Man #3 totally deserved for all the times he has touched us, but I digress). Brian is a young, black male, wearing simple but nice clothing and carrying some sort of briefcase. Brian is OBVIOUSLY HIGHLY INTOXICATED. Brian exits the bookstore and makes his way to one of our regular tailgating families. We then see him get a beer, a hotdog, and then put his arm around their young daughter. Uhh..what? Brian stays with that family for about 30 minutes, and then we think we see him leave. Charles and I discussed what life would be like if it were just one big tailgate. Where people didn't see race or class, but just shared their hotdogs and beer with everyone. Le sigh.

Then, Brian re-emerges in the parking lot, this time at the tailgate of some d-bags with a super thick credit card (no really, it is thicker than a regular card. i think he said it is made of titanium. douchebag). D-bag comes into the store and asks Eric to make Brian leave. So Eric talks to him, blah blah and he eventually leaves. Pretty smart way to get free beer and food.

Charles also made an alarming observation-Georgia Tech fans seemed so much nicer than Georgia fans. We theorized that it was because their school is not known for their football, but their intelligence (oh that every college were like that...funny, huh?), so this wasn't a huge deal for them. Georgia fans, however, football is really all they have going for them. that and their job at their daddy's law firm. And their sculpted facial hair. D-bags.

I thought that I really hated Georgia football culture before today, but today really sealed it. And I'll tell you why. A man came in and paid for $10 worth of stuff with a $100 bill, because he wanted the change for later. I gave him a $50 bill and two 20s and some change. He emphatically told me that he could not accept the 50. I assumed he was joking. I tried again to give him his change. He again refused, saying, "you can't give that to someone in the South! Oh no, especially not before a football game. do you know who is on the 50??? Oh no, I cannot have a $50 bill".

Seriously?

In case you're wondering, U.S. Grant is on the $50 bill.

You know, the UNION GENERAL who helped the "North" to win the Civil War.

THOSE DAMN YANKEES.

I was horrified at his refusal, and logic. I hate this town.

I know this post has been super negative, but I have just been given multiple examples of poor behavior from the people I'm supposed to identify with. No, thank you.

Some good did come of today. I finished reading The Pelican Brief, and I rented and watched it. So good, but must check closets for assassins before bed.

Also, Bill Bacon, who I have lusted after since August, put his phone number in my phone today at work. Does that mean something? Can I bootycall Bill Bacon?

obsession

2008-11-21T10:43:00.000-05:00

I tend to obsess over things in general; however, there are two things that I cannot seem to stop obsessing over and those two things are lip product and office supplies, specifically lip BALM and pens. I cannot seem to stop purchasing them. I haven't bought any sort of lip related item since October, which I am very proud of. Pens, on the other hand, I have not been able to drop so easily. I keep finding new kinds that I like! And since my place of work sells a VARIETY of pens, they are constantly staring me down, pleading with me, "Please, write with us!" So I do.

I am composing this because yesterday, something wonderful happened. Along with trying new pens and lip balms, I also love to use stuff up. I love emptying a bottle of lotion or wearing down an eraser. But since I have so many lip balms and pens, it makes me especially happy to get rid of a pen or tube of chapstick. YESTERDAY, I threw away THREE PENS! It was amazing. And they were all dead, not just like I got tired of them, I had used all the ink they had to offer me. Man it was a good day.

a few thoughts

2008-11-14T13:36:00.000-05:00

I saw a penny on the ground today. It was on tails. I couldn't remember if it was lucky to pick up a penny heads side up or penny side up. Then I thought...are there people out there who really only pick up lucky pennies? Or people that rely on happening upon a lucky penny for their life to change? Either way, its still money. I did not pick it up.

I decided today that I want to marry a man with an interesting face. There are plenty of nice looking, ordinary people who will in turn grow old and be ordinary looking old people. I want to marry a man who will make an interesting looking old man. I prefer interesting to ordinary.

What is it about birthdays that make people want to spend money on you? Don't get me wrong, I am all for people buying me things. I guess it is a way to show you that they are happy that you were born.

I've had a birthday, shout hooray

2008-11-11T22:47:00.000-05:00

Well kids, today is my 23rd birthday. Ho ventitre anni. Last year, I went to Charleston for my birthday, and as I drove back, I listened to and contemplated Tom Waits' song " I Don't Wanna Grow Up", but this year, as I think about my future, I do really want to grow up. I know that I have a lot of good ahead in the next few years and I look forward to those things. A year from now, I will be one month away from graduating college. I will be (close to ) fluent in Italian. I hope to, in the next year, become more friendly and less weird about developing new relationships My puppy will be 2 years old. I think, what have I done in the last 23 years? And while there is nothing HUGE and CATASTROPHIC that I have done, there are a few things I can think of. I've seen countless beautiful things and I know countless beautiful people. I have spent 23 years with the most incredible, talented, creative, intelligent, loving and loyal family, individuals that I feel honored to know and love. I have learned so many fascinating things about the world I live in, which only makes me want to learn more. I am a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, which has brought me more joy and comfort than I can express. I took part in the conversion of a young woman who went on to serve a mission, who in turn took part in the conversion of many others. I have attempted to love those around me and make them smile. While I recognize that I have done many things in the past 23 years, I still have lots more to do. CONTINENTS to see. People to love. Beauty to admire. Books to read. Children to read to. Someone today said that 23 is not a significant year; I disagree. Every year is a significant year. Every year, every day that one lives can be significant and I intend to make 23 memorable. Significant.

One year old and wiser, too.

hating my mac right now

2008-11-10T12:57:00.001-05:00

OMG I JUST PICKED UP MY COMPUTER AND TOOK IT HOME AND I STILL HAVE THE SAME PROBLEM EVEN THOUGH THEY SAID THEY FIXED IT OMG I AM SO MAD.

worst week

2008-11-09T19:32:00.000-05:00

This will be brief, as I now have to go back to my apartment to write a paper from what I can gleen from my textbook.

Tuesday. The election of a lifetime. I was anxious all day about who would win. I also was disgusted at the ignorance displayed on facebook, and so I posted the blog "decision 2008" on my facebook page. I stayed up until my man won, and then went to sleep.

Wednesday. I decided to skip my baroque class so I could go to the dmv and get a new license. I had mailed the renewal form, but since I moved and forwarded my mail, I never received it. The dmv does not forward mail. I had to go and renew it in person and i expected it to take all day. I was in and out in 15 minutes. Also, they made my take a new picture. Bleh. Sammy thought he had appendicitis today, as well. That made me upset, that my little brother was in pain and might have to have surgery. All during this, my phone was blowing up with people commenting on the facebook note about the election. People were being super rude to me in their comments (ok, some were not, some were very well thought out and not personal). I started to stress out over it, taking it very personally. I went to my gender and feminism class, ready to take notes and noticed that my computer was completely dead, even though it had been plugged in all night and all day. I ended up taking notes in my planner. I ran home between class and work to charge my computer. I went to work, still stressing about Sam and facebook, and then went home to do some work. My computer would not turn on. At all. I almost cried. I took it to peachmac, where I waited for about 20 minutes for a man with the apple logo tattooed on his arm to help me. I almost cried when they told me they would have to keep it for a few days. Like, it took all my energy to not sob at the counter. I got in my car and cried all the way home. I got very little studying done for my 18th century test tomorrow.

Thursday. I went to the slc before Italian to check on some things. I checked my bank account. My rent check had gone through before I expected, which over drafted my account. There were also 4 other transactions that went through after that, which just continued to over draft my account. Cry cry cry. Five $35 fees. There goes my rent money for December. My test was not that bad, but I still should have studied a lot more. I went to work and attempted to study for my italian test which is tomorrow. After work I had to go to the slc (ugh) to do the audio exercises we had to turn in. I really miss my computer.

Friday. Friday was not actually that bad. My test was kind of embarrassing as I did very poorly on it, I think. I realized that I have a baroque paper due on Monday, and I may not have a computer. I did go to Atlanta and spent the night. I went to bed at 4:30am.

Saturday. Not a bad day. Stayed in Atlanta until around 3 and then came home. Went straight to Dad's to celebrate my birthday and then went home, painted my nails and was in bed by 11.

Sunday. Today, also not bad. Church was good. I was released from my fave calling of relief society teacher and immediately called as a member of the activities committee. I went to Mom's right after church to celebrate with her. I didn't get back to Athens until close to 5:30 and I need to write the baroque paper. Its just a comparison essay, so it should not be difficult. I looked at the slide choices and realized that half of my notes are on my computer. Which is not with me. So now, I have to go home, write a paper based on information from the book ( I pray it is there) and then I guess come back at like 7 am and type it. I am so not happy right now.

My birthday is Tuesday. Things better be looking up by then.

decision 2008

2008-11-03T23:19:00.000-05:00

As many of you know, I voted for Barack Obama. I believe he can direct this country out of the obscurity that it has been driven in to.

I have been amazed at the amount of HATE toward Obama I have seen on Facebook. People use words like evil, communist, etc. I do not understand how people can be so rude and immature. I publicly announced my support of Obama via my facebook status and immediately got responses containing so much negativity, saying I was dumb, that they were disappointed in me, among other things. I can understand not agreeing with someone politically; but presenting your opinion in such an immature way is unbelievable to me. Also, I have many liberal friends on the facebook and I have seen very few super negative things about McCain on their statuses, links, pages, etc. I know that it is out there, and I have made one or two "zingers" about Sarah Palin myself, but there seems to be a maturity (knowledge?) gap between my liberal friends and my conservative friends.

I guess what I'm trying to get at is I just wish people could be a little kinder in their giving of opinions, especially about something like this. I have done my research, I know what I voted for, and I kind of doubt that a lot of the people telling me that I am dumb and/or voting for a communist have done theirs'. I also kind of think that if they were better informed, they would not behave the way they do.

Or they would vote democrat.

Obama 2008

morgan made me do it

2008-11-01T19:01:00.000-04:00

8 Favorite TV Shows

1 The Office

2 Bones

3 House

4 Big Bang Theory

5 How I Met Your Mother

6 Old Christine

7 CSI

8 What Not to Wear

8 Things I Did Yesterday

1 Worked Out

2 Washed my hair

3 Had lunch with family

4 Voted

5 Drove to Clemson

6 Watched a mime change a flat tire

7 Wore a beret

8 Got $14 wayfarer knock-offs

8 Things I Look Forward to

1 My birthday

2 A new president

3 Graduating

4 Christmas

5 Thanksgiving

6 Reading by the fireplace

7 Having a car that will not potentially explode

8 Being able to afford real wayfarers

8 Favorite Restaurants

1 The Grit

2 Clocked

3 Transmet

4 Five Star Day

5 RuSans

6 Last Resort

7 Casa Mia

8 Mexicali

8 Things on My Wishlist

1 Rayban Wayfarers

2 to own a great work of art

3 My grandpa's 1980 Mercedes sitting in his yard

4 A new down comforter

5 A more charitable attitude

6 the ability to speak and understand Italian

7 A J Crew Wedding

8 A man to participate in said J Crew wedding

an evening with Matt Crunk, Esquire

2008-11-01T17:49:00.001-04:00

I have decided to try an experiment, where I ask on a date each of the single men at my branch. While I am not particularly interested in pursuing a relationship with any of them, I feel that the social practice of interacting with someone of the male gender would be really good for me so that when I do meet someone I would like to date I don't end up acting like a complete buffoon in their presence.

My focus is on pre-med and pre-law. That really is a joke, but it seems that all of the men I have dated have been one of the two. Plus, if they are pre-something, it probably means that they are really smart, which I like. I began by asking out one Michael Davis who is a law student here at UGA. I actually asked him out a long time ago, before this experiment, but we never actually went out. I decided that he would be the first of the men I went out with, since we had previously decided that we could go on a date.

Apparently, asking someone on a date in June and never going on an actual date with them makes them angry. Michael Davis does not return my phone calls, then does not offer an explanation beyond "Hello" when I see him at church, and does not interact with me even when I am at his apartment watching a movie with his roommate. That knocks one guy off the list. It's ok, he blends things in his room.

Next up, Matt Crunk. Matt is a first year law student at UGA. I met him in September and decided that I did not want to date him after hearing that he is a staunch conservative. However, after formulating my experiment, I thought he would make a great candidate.

Last Sunday, I planned to ask him out. Much like I planned to ask him out the Monday before and choked when he said hello. Sunday, I managed not to even speak to him, even when he was standing next to me. Idiot. I got his phone number from my darling friend Josh (also a staunch conservative but great advocate of me speaking to men) and called him that afternoon. I asked if he would like to have dinner with me on Saturday (today). He said that he could not, but that he would love to go out sometime this week, would I be at family home evening, could we talk then. Absolutely.

Wait a minute.

Did I just make an appointment to make a date?

As I was dolling myself up for my fhe appointment with Matt Crunk, he called to tell me that he would not be a fhe, but he was planning out his schedule for the week and would try to work me one night before Friday. He would schedule everything and call me tomorrow.

I am now waiting to be penciled into a man's schedule.

He did call Tuesday to let me know that Thursday would be great, could we meet at the institute at 7pm. Sure.

When I realized I had no idea what we would be doing, I called him back on Wednesday to ask if I needed to plan something. He told me that we could go get dinner quickly, as I would have just gotten off work and was sure to be hungry, but he had allotted only an hour to an hour and a half for dinner, so it had to be somewhere kind of fast.

This just keeps getting better.

Thursday came and we went to Willie's, which is a burrito place. I told him that I had never eaten a burrito and that he could not watch me eat as it would end up all over me. He laughed and said that is why he picked it, I guess so he could watch as I awkwardly pulled peppers out of my mouth and licked beans off my hand, which is what happened.

I may have made this sound like something awful and it totally was not. I had a great time with Mr. Crunk. He was very easy to talk to and super nice and wonderfully clever. As we parted ways so he could study property law, he told me he had a great big project to work on for the rest of the semester. So I said, "uhhh...guess I'll see you in December." To which he said,

"Oh, you'll see me before then."

Experiment One: Success.

man, I feel like a woman

2008-10-04T22:42:00.000-04:00

In my gender and feminism in art history class, we have been discussing the female as spectator and how that is problematic and not theorized etc etc. We had just watched two soda commercials, one diet coke commercial from the early 90s where an office full of women ogle a construction worker together, and then a more recent diet pepsi commercial where women (and one Carson) follow a guy with a can of diet pepsi. I had, for an hour, thought about what it means for me, as a woman, to look at men.

When I left class, I was walking to the bus stop, when a man in some low slung running shorts and ZERO shirt ran by. That was nice. THEN, a whole slew of topless men ran by. I all but stopped and watched them run by with my mouth hanging open.

I spectated, all right. With no problem at all.

breaking news on breakouts

2008-09-30T22:50:00.001-04:00

I apologize that I have not really posted anything of substance lately, and this is no exemption. It is really kind of shallow and/or vain, but it is highly important to me.

I have had really really bad skin since I was like 13. Gross acne, mostly all along my chin. Which means I have been desperately trying for the last ten years to have pretty skin.

TA DA!

With the help of a cocktail of birth control and proactiv, I think that my skin has finally grown up. I haven't used proactiv since...July? I'm still on le pill, but I haven't broken out since then. I do have some scars which I think will only go away with something like microdermabrasion, but other than that, I finally have healthy looking skin.

Finally. At 23. Better late than never?

his hair was perfect

2008-09-28T16:40:00.000-04:00

I found my Halloween costume!!!!!!!

My friend Zach and I are going to be Andy Warhol and Edie Sedgwick.

I'm Andy, he is Edie.

I cannot wait!

I see trees of green

2008-09-24T12:32:00.000-04:00

It is just after noon and I have just finished furiously writing a brief paper for my gender and feminism in art history test. My room looks out into the "backyard". I have a set of two old, wooden windows and my desk is just under them. If I am sitting at my desk and look up, all I see are trees and little bits of sky. Today is one of the most beautiful days I have experienced, aside from me spilling coke all down the front of my white shirt this morning and not studying for this test until just now. It is sunny, painfully blue and fa fresco. As I was typing my paper at my desk, surrounded by papers on Artemisia Gentileschi and Charpentier, I heard a breeze stirring the leaves of the trees and looked up. All I could see were trees and sky. Trees, sky, breeze, kitten, art and feminism.

What a wonderful world.

i go back to black

2008-09-23T22:33:00.000-04:00

I have, in the last month, acquired two rather small black things. One of these no one seems to care that much about, and the other has caused...let's say, quite a stir.

They both were relatively inexpensive, under $100, one being about $25 more than the other. One will perhaps greatly influence the way other people view me and the other could do the same, but in a slightly more amusing way. They both impact my daily life and both make me very happy.

The first thing I got was a tattoo of the word "timshel" across my left wrist. It was $60 and more uncomfortable than painful. I really like how it has turned out and am happy to have a constant reminder that everything in life is a choice and regardless of my circumstances, I still have a choice. In other words, I have a constant reminder to go out everyday and be a total BAMF.

The second black object that I acquired is a lil black kitten I adopted. The adoption was $85, and she will, I'm sure, cost me much more in money, time and patience.

Like I said, one has been more well received than the other. While the kitten is a living creature that I have to feed, love and clean up after, AND was more expensive, no one seems to care that I am slowly amassing a menagerie of black animals. The tattoo, on the other hand (pun intended...'cause you know, its near my hand...) might as well be black plague instead of black ink. My father said he was disappointed in me (I'm sure he says this out of concern for how future employers will view me...I'm sure schools don't hire art professors with tattoos). My boss has openly said he thinks all tattoos are trashy.

I reckon then I'm a trashy cat lady.

Not a level-headed individual well on her way to earning many, many degrees.

Johnny Cash and Amy Winehouse will still be my friends.

I saw a werewolf drinking a pina colada

2008-09-22T22:53:00.000-04:00

I need suggestions as to what to be for Halloween. I have a few ideas, but I welcome ANY. My ideas are as follows:

-The log lady from Twin Peaks

-Amelia Earheart

-A painter (scarf, beret, moustache, etc)

-Bonnie (of Bonnie and Clyde, which would require a male counterpart)

Absolutely nothing trashy, please. Unless it would be to dress as white trash. But no sexed up nurse or devil or kitten or something lame like that.

WHAT DO YOU THINK

KTHNX

sick

2008-09-21T18:52:00.000-04:00

when i see people eating un-toasted bagels with nothing on them, it makes me want to vomit

le sigh...un souhait naitre dans dix huit siecle France

2008-09-18T22:52:00.000-04:00

Since I discussed briefly my minor and how it relates to my self-image yesterday, I thought today I might discuss briefly my major and how it relates to my self-image. I am an art history major, and this semester am taking FOUR art history classes. One of them being 18th century European art.

We are now studying Rococo genre paintings. We were discussing the de Troy work Diana Resting and how it relates to Rococo, but how it is evident in the work that de Troy was still an Academie trained artist. One of her examples were the women in the work. Let me expound on that.

Dr. Luxenburg said that because the women were idealized, that showed that de Troy was trained. Let me also say that if you were to ask me to describe myself to someone or if someone else were to describe me, they might use the words fair skinned, dark hair and some form of the words "pleasantly plump", which I don't think exist in the English language without a negative connotation. Anyway, Dr. L went on to clarify what she meant when she said that the female figures were idealized. She said "You have to remember that when I say idealized, I mean what was seen as most attractive in France at that time. The women are buxom, with pale, pale skin and chestnut hair. This is what would have been seen as 'ideal' at the time of de Troy's training".

Damn.

I'm just a couple of centuries too late. By American standards, I'm not classified as "ideal". Had I lived in the place of my ancestors in the 1700s however, I would have been considered a fox. You win again, current American beauty standards, you win again.

warning: blog about boobs

2008-09-17T21:50:00.000-04:00

My boobs have never been that big. The women in my family tend to have larger breasts, so when I hit puberty and nothing really happened and I turned 18 and nothing really happened and I turned 22 and nothing really happened, I kind of gave up on the idea of being well-endowed. And I FINALLY became ok with that. My shirts fit over them, dresses too. I often don't wear a bra because, hell, I don't really need to. My back never hurts because of them. Its just enough to be feminine, but not too much that I have to purchase special brassieres. I used to believe that if a woman had large breasts, she was to be really excited about that because a large chest=attractive. However, in my tender college years, i have learned that is rarely the case.

I have two friends who have C or bigger boobs. They hate them. They both want a reduction. They so often complain that they are too big, they get in the way, they make their back hurt, they don't fit in the bra they have on and they refuse to buy a size bigger. My first reaction is usually "aw, my friends are uncomfortable, I'm sorry" and that thought is quickly replaced by "hheeeelllll yeah! what do American beauty standards know about women? NOTHING!"

As many of you know, I am a women's studies minor, so this kind of thing is HIGHLY interesting to me. This example is a reminder to me that those whacked out expectations of women to look a certain way are probably created by men. And yes, I'm sure there is some Freudian or tribal sort of lust for large breasts because they symbolize fertility and motherhood and whatnot, however, who the hell decided that to be considered attractive, a woman had to have large breasts? I don't know, but if I find him, I'd like to...I don't know, slap him or something because there are lots of women who do not think they are attractive because they don't have C+ boobs. And then there are women who think they are unattractive BECAUSE they have large breasts. While I have (mostly) come to terms with my breast size, there are loads of other women who have not. I wish there was one less thing women had to critique on their own bodies.

Next stop...accepting the fact that yes, my hip bones are in fact that wide. The whole boob thing took almost ten years, the hips may take just as long.

if you were gay, that'd be ok

2008-09-16T22:56:00.000-04:00

This semester, I am taking italian 1002. There are...12 of us in the class and there are two men in the class. And that is it. One of the two men I assumed was gay from the beginning (which I know, you should not assume about someone's sexuality just because of the way they talk or dress or sit or whatever) and that was later confirmed via facebook. The other man...was Andrew.

I have thought Andrew was so super cute since day one of italian 1002. And I found out he plays the French horn. And he has a black cat (like me!) I talked to him briefly a few times in class. I decided that I would make my move and ask him to study with me for our upcoming test. Before doing so, I looked at his facebook page (because I am creepy) to see if he had a girlfriend.

Andrew had several gay markers, which I will not go into at the moment.

However, I refused to believe that out of around 15,000 men at the University of Georgia, someone thought it would be funny to put only two in a class of 12 and have both of men prefer the company of men. I did end up studying with Andrew, and another girl in our class. I kept trying to think of a way to ask if he was gay, but how do you bring that up? I did ask about his relationship status on facebook, which says that he is married to some girl (which I took to mean that he was actually married, or that this was one of the gay markers I mentioned). I asked him and he said "Ohhh no, I'm not married. And as long as I live in America, I guess I won't be."

What.

Ok ok that should have been a definite answer. But no, I won't rest until I hear " I AM GAY". Later, after we had all parted ways, I sent him a text asking what he meant when he said that. I also followed it with "Cause if you're straight, I'd like to ask you out. And if you're gay, well, I'd like to ask you to date me, without the sex." He thought that was pretty funny and confirmed my suspicion, that he is in fact, gay. I then asked him to spend lots of time with me and tell me that I'm pretty and how does he feel about just cuddling with women. He's a good sport and thinks I'm funny. I guess I have a new (gay) boyfriend. In fact, I just got home from his concert. He's in the orchestra.

Two men in a class of 12. What are the odds.

You're going to argue with me over a spatula?

2008-09-01T21:27:00.000-04:00

Today is my first day in my new apartment! I have lived in le duplex for the past four years, so this is quite a nice change, aside from the apartment smell and chintzy wallpaper. I have found myself making several trips to the store, I keep finding things that I need, which is kind of frustrating. I have finally gotten to the point where I like my bathroom (THIS IS THE FIRST TIME IN MY LIFE THAT I HAVE HAD A BATHROOM ATTACHED TO MY ROOM IT IS WONDERFUL), except the tub is rotting away from the wall, so I'll need to have that fixed. Parker has kind of dominated the downstairs, which is ok with me, for now.

Let me speak about Parker for a moment, if I may. Parker is my older brother and is incredibly intelligent and incredibly maniacal. He has of late bounced around from state to state, with the same job and somehow, I'm still not clear on that story, ended up living back in Athens. Parker has been known to drink occasionally, to excess. I have been moving my stuff in over the last few days, and he has usually not been here when I am. Yesterday I came by and saw his motorcycle outside, but did not see him. His bedroom door was open, but he was not there. I found him on the couch. My coming in must have awoken him, as I soon heard "Dammit! I'm supposed to be at work in 10 minutes!" What the hell. I continued what I was doing when he came upstairs, fully dressed and asked if I could take him to work. What the hell.

"You can't drive?"

"Well, you see, sister, I'm still slightly intoxicated from last night." (it is 11:45am, by the way)

If this is any indication of how the next however-long-we-live-together-here is going to be, I'm going to...probably do something bad. Or just be really pissed off.

Beggars can't be choosers...like...I won't let them

2008-08-07T20:15:00.000-04:00

This is horribly old news (2006!!!), but I was thinking about it the other day and since I haven't posted anything recently, I thought it would make for a fun read.

After I had gone to Morgan and David's wedding reception and fallen on my face in the street, Kendra and I went downtown to watch Twilight. For those of you who have not been blessed with the knowledge of what Twilight is, it is a bike race through downtown Athens. And its hella cool. Anyway, we had gotten dinner from Five Star Day Cafe to go and were sitting on a bench on College eating and talking before the race started. We had finished eating and what appeared to be a homeless woman rolled up to us in a wheelchair and asked us for money for food. At Five Star Day, they give you this corn muffin with every meal. I do not particularly like them, so I offered mine to the woman. She told me that she was diabetic and that she did not want the offered corn muffin, but what she really wanted was something from Gyro Wrap.

Wtf.

The Expected Behaviors of Southern Women

2008-08-02T21:24:00.000-04:00

This blog is dedicated to one Shelley Nicole Young. She has the charge of teaching me how to dress like I'm from the west coast, while I am to teach her how to talk like she is from the deep south. Maybe this here blog will further her Southern education.

As previously mentioned, I work at a bookstore that also sells Georgia STUFF. The University of Georgia is steeped in tradition. Some which are (somewhat) honorable, some are obnoxious and some still are just trashy. One tradition that has plagued me most of my life is the defined role that a good (read: obedient?) Southern woman should act out. I say "act out" because, as any good (read: damn smart?) Southern woman knows, it is simply an act. Yes, you may think that drinking at 7am on a Saturday is fun, or that your husband's jokes are kind of funny, but for the most part, it is a role that you play; one that I have observed and almost perfected (minus the accent...oops....), mostly from my experience at the bookstore. I will now list and try to define some of these (outrageous) expected behaviors of Suthen women.

-You love football. You really really love it. Georgia is the only football team there is, and you despise any other football team in the SEC. You say clever things like "I hate orange" and "Gators wear jean shorts". Any football team outside of the SEC is alright. Not as good as Georgia, but you don't have to hate them. And you should probably know something about their quarterback. And if a man asks you if you like football, just say yes. The following silence or smartass remark is not worth your honesty.

-Your husband/boyfriend/male counterpart is HILARIOUS. Anything he says is funny. Well, any joke he makes is funny. Said jokes can be recognized in the way they are delivered:

#1 The male will say something sarcastic about any one of the following:

-The weather

-Another football team

-Women

-Drinking

-Any combination of the previous

#2 The male will then look at you with a huge, stupid grin on his face. At this point, you

are expected to laugh.*

The laugh can be fake. I, personally, have a pretty good fake laugh, but Chelsea's is definitely the best. Very convincing. The male may know that you are laughing only to appease him, but that is ok, as long as you make an effort.

-Regardless of how your male treats you in public, you are to smile and accept it. You can even say something like "You know men!" or "boys will be boys...." I usually want to slap these women, and then slap their males for treating them so poorly. I've seen men yell at women, "playfully" hit them, talk down to them and they just smile and take it. Like a true Southern gentlewoman.

-There is a special breed of Southern women that are mostly exempt from these rules. The loud, brassy Southern woman. She is loud and opinionated and vocal and will tease her husband in public. This role must be established early in life to be accepted as an adult. You mostly can't become this woman; you are either born this way or perfect it in your youth. Southern men don't take too kindly to women forming opinions and just springing them on them later in life. No, sir. HOWEVER, no matter how brusque these women are, they are never to do anything to embarrass the male in public. There are severe consequences for that.

There are several other misogynistic things I could list such as not having opinions of your own, being financially dependent on your male, etc etc. I have had to witness many of these things over my years in the heart of the Bulldawg nation and have suffered through them with a big fake smile plastered across my cute lil face. I hope one day to stand up to this. For now, I'll continue wearing my red and black with pride and agreeing that this is going to be one hell of a football season. It always is.

*There is an exception to this rule. Depending on the public relationship you have established with your male, it can be acceptable to, following step #1, slap him across the arm while saying "You smartass, let's go".

I like my beat down low and my top let back

2008-07-31T21:23:00.000-04:00

I feel as though every other post I have posted has been of me complaining about my life. I decided that I should find something daily to post about that I LOVE. Today, as I was driving home, I was exhausted and annoyed and it was raining, etc etc. Instead of continuing to be annoyed, whatever, I cranked up my music and rolled down my windows.

I first listened to my acoustic version of "Hey Ya". I LOVE belting out the "shake it shake it" part, soon followed by "HHHHEEEEEYYYYYY YAAAAAA". Ohhh that made me so happy.

THEN, whenever I'm driving and its raining, I like to play the song "I Make it Rain". Which I think is HILARIOUS. It makes me laugh so hard to turn that up so loud and laugh and sing.

It was a great 12 minutes.

lord, if you won't make me skinny, please make my friends fat

2008-07-30T19:37:00.000-04:00

I have worked at the same bookstore for four years. It is a textbook store, and we also sell Georgia paraphernalia. When I began working there, I really enjoyed Georgia football and really the whole collegiate spirit whatever. I also believed that people were good and nice and polite.

Over time, I have seen many people walk in and out of our doors. Those people have ruined my desire to associate with UGA and any sport thereof. Or associate with people. At all. I used to think that the rude people I came in contact with in the bookstore only behaved that way in our bookstore. That something about walking through our doors made them want to talk on their phone loudly, ask questions directed to no one in particular, yelling, cursing, etc etc. I would often wonder if they always acted like that, that if they went into Blockbuster and asked "well if you don't have it, does hollywood video? Could you call them and check?" Then, recently, I decided, these people act like this EVERYWHERE. They act like an ass wherever they go!

I could go on and on about the people that I have to work for. I cannot stand the attitude that so many college students have, the sense of entitlement that comes to them from...who knows where. Today, I was in the downstairs part of the store all day by myself and we were SO busy. I was doing buybacks, checking people out, answering the phone, putting out novelties. I was so hot and tired and angry. The title of this blog was a quote on some girl's check. If that gives you any idea of what my day was like.

...and I like muenster.

2008-07-24T22:45:00.000-04:00

Today at work, I decided that I would cook dinner and dessert for myself. I haven't really cooked at all since efy and I wanted to try something different. I set my mind on ham and mozzarella quesadillas and an ice cream cake. The ice cream cake was relatively simple compared to the quesadillas; at least, in buying the ingredients.

I had never gone up to a deli counter and ordered anything. Something feels so grown-up about going up to a counter and saying "I would like ______ of _________, please". I got a starbucks quadruplechocolateoverloadfrappacapplatte or whatever its called and waltzed up to the deli counter at Kroger. At this point, i feel confident and very adult. That soon faded. There were like five people behind the counter and no one would make eye contact with me. I may have cleared my throat a little, in a minute effort to gain attention. Finally, someone offered to help me. I said, "Could I please have a pound of mozzarella and a half pound of ham?"

Blank stare.

Clear throat again. "A pound of mozzarella and a half pound of ham?"

Nothing.

Deli attendant: "You want what and ham?"

Really? Mozzarella?

"Mozzarella?"

At this point, there are TWO imbeciles helping me, and neither of them seem to understand Italian. The two of them look around the cheeses and the lady said something to the effect of "We do not have mozzarella. Will this do?" She held up some pepper jack bizznaz. "NO! That is not even in the same cheese family as mozzarella!" I screamed in my head. I smiled politely and said, "No, thank you. I'll just have the ham, please". The guy then chuckled and and said, "Yeah, I don't know much about mozzarella. Only time I eat that is when I order those fried cheese sticks at restaurants".

Idiot.

Not Mai Thai

2008-07-23T22:30:00.000-04:00

I have prided myself for having what I call an iron constitution. I can pretty much eat whatever I want, whenever I want and not get sick. Heck, I could probably go on one of those "hey eat this and we'll pay you" shows. Tonight, however, I met my match: Thai Spoon.

Today is Chelsea's birthday, so we all went out to dinner. We had planned for weeks to go to Mama's Boy. We arrived shortly after 6pm only to find that they close at 2:30pm. Of course. We then went to Thai Spoon instead. I LOVE thai food. I first had it in Provo, Utah with Utah Martin That Could Tolerate Me. It was so good. Not only was I having a delicious meal with some good friends, I was back in downtown Athens. We sat by a window so I could people watch as we ate. My food was so good and I got to try everyone else's and everything was DELICIOUS.

Cut to 9pm.

Sickness.

So....to recap the past 22 years of my life:

Gumbo? Yes

Shrimp and grits? Yes

Jambalaya? Yes

Big Tim's BBQ? Yes

Pad Se Ew? No. HELL no.

Bleh.

I hate TV

2008-07-22T18:29:00.000-04:00

When my father moved back into my (tiny) duplex, he had the cable turned back on. Why my father has moved back into my house is a brilliant story in and of itself. I'll get to that another time. I had gone without television for a little over a year and I learned to love it. I even learned to love saying "I don't have cable" when people would ask me if I had seen a new show or commercial. While I was doing efy, Dad moved back in and turned the cable back on. I didn't think much of it, that I wouldn't even really watch it. I got back to my house and didn't really watch anything Sunday, almost as if I had forgotten how to use a television. Then Monday rolled around. I turned it on around 10am and I have no idea how long I watched TV. It was embarrassing. Me wasting all that time is only one reason I don't like TV. As I was watching different shows and lots of commercials, I realized that one reason people are so messed up is because they watch television. Of course given my women's studies background, I noticed that there is a lot on TV directed at women. It makes me kind of sick. I can't wait until I go back to work and school so I'm gone all day. Maybe then I can tear myself away. Go read a book.

welcome welcome

2008-07-21T16:30:00.000-04:00

I told Shelley that I would start a blog. So I am. I am leaving for Danielsville soon, to go to fhe at mio madre's house. I'll write more later. Promise.