love on the rocks

I completely omitted a very funny happening from New Year's Eve.  My friends and I went to Aldo's, an Italian restaurant in Atlanta.  My darling friend Dave joined us and I begged him to sit next to me so that we could continue whispering witticisms about the people around us.  He did sit next to me and soon, our waitress approached.

Russian waitress-"Will you two be on the same ticket?"

American patrons-"No, it will be separate."

American Dave-"She won't marry me."

-laughter from Dave, myself, and whoever else heard it at the table-

Russian waitress-"I hope that is not your final answer."

-embarrassment on my part and more laughter-

American Bonnie-"I'd rather not talk about it." (which I said hoping the Russian waitress would get it that THE WHOLE THING WAS A JOKE)

Dave and I thought it would be funny to allow the waitress to see us holding hands at some point during the meal.  So we did.  After a lovely meal and conversation, listening to other people discuss their phones and diseases and after I told my friend who is engaged that brown is too a heavy a color to use for a June wedding, our bills came.  

I joked and said that mine and Dave's would be a on the same ticket.

My food was on Dave's ticket.  Dammit.  And he paid for it.  Double dammit.

While this was a somewhat awkward experience, I learned a valuable lesson.  

Sit next to a man at dinner, hold his hand at some point during the meal, and he just might pay for your food.